Fairy Tail: Crack Moments
by gezusgeek
Summary: This is going to be a 50 chapter series of Fairy Tail oneshots of random ideas I've managed to come up with involving many characters, moments, hilarious content, and stories that pretty much have no actual meaning other than to entertain fans. (I DO NOT OWN FAIRY TAIL)
1. Sleepover

We start our series of Crack Moments with sweet and innocent Lucy Heartfillia, sleeping soundly in her bed. Her form was calm and peaceful...Until the writer decided to evily make this story.

Her seemingly perfect evening was rudely, and loudly interrupted by four other women as they burst into the poor blonde's room.

Erza, the loudest of the four, decided to show her excitement by ripping Lucy's blanket right out of her (thought to be) firmly clamped fingers. Lucy grounded as the redhead's eyes widened with sparkles. "Lucy! It's about time we have a sleep over!"

Lucy glared up at her. "A what..?" However, her attempts were quickly overlooked as Titania started rearranging Lucy's room without her permission while singing some unknown tune. So instead, Lucy sat up and looked at the others as they came over to her with guilty looks.

Levy was the first to speak. "We're sorry Lu-chan! We mentioned the words 'Sleep' and 'Over' in the same group of sentences and then we couldn't stop her…"

Wendy nodded meekly. "It's true. She made us pack all of our things at fairy hills and then made us come with her here as soon as possible…"

Lucy's anger at being trespassed again slowly faded away as she thought about what had happened and gave them all a small smile. After being dragged around by Erza (probably literally too) Lucy thought that they deserved some pity. "It's fine, I should have expected something like this from her anyways…"

The Celestial Wizard sighed before noticing that Juvia looked very confused. She blinked. "Juvia? What's wrong?"

Juvia looked at her ex-love rival and hugged her Gray plushie tightly. "Juvia is nervous because she has never had a sleepover before."

The other three girls looked to one another in surprise before giggling. Wendy looked up at her with a smile. "Don't worry! It's my first time too!" Juvia returned the smile.

Not long after that, what had sounded like construction from Erza's direction had stopped. They looked over to find the other half of Lucy's room completely changed. Lucy's jaw dropped with a squeal. "HOW EVEN!?"

What caused such a reaction? Well, somehow, Erza had found a huge flat-screen TV and a popcorn maker, five sleeping bags, a whole collection of DVD lacrima, along with a mini-fridge and lots of cake, other sweets and junk food.

The other girls shared the same look as Lucy. Levy's eyes were very wide. "W-Wow Erza…"

Said Requip Mage smiled with pride at them. "I made sure we would be prepared! Now we may begin!" She sat down on what she had claimed to be her sleeping bag and patting the space in front of her, indicating them to sit with her.

Sharing nervous looks, they decided to join her in the end, claiming their own sleeping bags. Wendy set Carla down before sitting down herself and looking to Erza. "So what should we do first Erza-san?"

The swordswoman thought a moment before something brilliant obviously came to mind. "We should watch a movie first! Then we can talk about our favorite characters and parts!"

They nodded in full agreement. Yes. A distraction would be good.

Two and a half hours later: Lucy's eye was twitching.

"What kind of movie was that!? Who wrote it!? My book is better! And I stink at writing!"

Wendy and Carla had somehow fallen asleep.

Levy couldn't un-narrow her eyes at the credits. "We live in a world of magic.., yet the graphics were so bad."

"Juvia doesn't like the love interest…"

Erza blinked at them. "Oh? I thought it was nice."

They all just stared at her for a moment with wide eyes. " **You did!?** "

She nodded and the other three just shook their heads. They should've known this would've happened when Erza was the one to pick the movie. Juvia looked at them. "What else do girls do at a sleepover? Juvia is very curious."

Lucy and Levy shared a look and suddenly something clicked in their minds. Grinning at one another, they turned to the other two. Levy started. "You know what girls do at a sleepover..?" Lucy giggled as she finished. "They share secrets!"

Erza and Juvia blinked but both had the same spark in their eyes. "Oh!"

Levy glanced at Lucy, who nodded before looking at them. "So, who wants to go first?"

A moment went by before Erza put her hand to her heart. "I shall go first! What should I share..?"

Levy gave a sly smile. "Okay, so each of us will ask you a question, and you have to answer, no matter what!" Erza got that same gleam in her eyes as before as she nodded.

Lucy raised her hand. "Alright! I'll ask first." Her conscience was laughing evilly right now. It was time for revenge. Her house had been ruined by the redhead far to many times. "Erza, how did you fall for Jellal?"

Erza's face suddenly became the same color as her hair. "W-W-W-W-What makes you think I fell for h-him?"

"Erza-san loves Jellal-san!?" This was somehow new news for the Water Mage and Levy just patted her shoulder as she was ignored.

Lucy rolled her eyes. "Please! It's so obvious! I just want to know how or when."

Lucy smirked as Erza started to visibly sweat. A sign that she was about to crack. A moment later, she blurted it all out. "Alright fine! I've had f-feelings for him before, ever since he gave me my last name as Scarlet…"

Levy and Lucy both gave fangirl squeals at this new found information. Surprisingly, Juvia was the one to blink and question. "Before? What about now?"

Erza glanced away. "I-I no longer have those feelings…" Levy and Lucy shared a look, unknowingly thinking the same thing: _Yeah Right!_

Levy gave a slight cough. "Alright, my turn, since Juvia asked her question. The other bluenette blinked, as if shocked that she had done so. Levy continued. "Okay Erza, so I've always wanted to know..,when did you start loving strawberry cake so much?"

Lucy facepalmed. Out of all of the secretive questions the smartest person in the room could've asked..,she asked that.

Erza, however, was very excited to share her story. "I loved strawberry cake since the moment I laid eyes on it! The shape, the texture, the glorious taste! Everything about it was so magnificent! You see, the very first time I had a bit was-" So the mage went on and on about her favorite food, making Levy wish she hadn't asked in the first place. After another forty-five minutes, she stopped her story only to have a piece she had brought.

By then, the other three girls only stared in stunned silence. Levy ran a hand down her face. "I'm sorry I asked…"

Lucy refused the urge to slam her head into the wall. "I never want to even see a piece of cake again..."

Juvia nodded meekly. "Juvia agrees…"

"Oh! I almost forgot to tell you the best part about Strawberry cake! You see-" And there she goes again. The other three grounded before falling over onto their sleeping bags. Lucy whined into her pillow. "Why me..?"

Levy tried to think of a solution, but failed. Not realizing that her eye started to twitch. "This is a form of torture, isn't it..?"

"Juvia agrees…"

Erza went on and on until morning, preventing all of the other women (besides Wendy, who was still sleeping soundly) from getting a wink of sleep. After they had all gotten out of bed and woken Wendy and Carla, they were walking towards the guild, leaving behind all of their things at Lucy's for the time being.

Wendy looked up at them with a guilty expression. "I'm sorry that I fell asleep at my first sleepover! I wish I could've had fun with the rest of you!" Lucy pondered on those words. 'Fun' she said..? First they watched a terrible movie, and then had to listen to hours of Erza's 'Cake Adventures'... "No Wendy, please don't worry about it."

Levy nodded, rubbing her eyes. "Really, feel grateful that you got some sleep…"

Juvia was swaying as she walked (most likely from lack of sleep) and nodded to her. "Yes Wendy-chan, please don't think you missed out on anything…"

All of them turned to the one leading them with a proud stance and happy features. Like she hadn't kept the others up all night with the only subject being her love for cake...

The four now had just made in into the guild, the doors shutting behind them. However, what they had walked into made three of them stop in there tracks and gawk in horror. Before them on every table and in front of every seat on the bar were Strawberry Cakes of different sizes and shapes.

Mira noticed them come in and smiled at them in greeting. "Well hello!" Erza looked to Mira in wonder and excitement. "What is all of this!? It's not my birthday!"

Mira giggled. "No silly, today is National Strawberry Cake Day! All of these cakes were donated to the guild." Erza and Wendy squealed in excitement but when they looked behind them to see the other three, they were in the process of running away and yelling over their shoulders. "NOT AGAIN! WHY CRUEL WORLD!?"

Wendy blinked in their direction. "What's happened to them?"

Erza started eating and glanced over at the still open doors. "I haven't the slightest idea."

THE END

 **A/N Okay, so I was greatly inspired to write this the start to a series of crack oneshots by FlyingWindex on Wattpad. XD After reading her own Crack book, I came up with a list of stupid crack ideas and decided to start this little project. (Don't worry, all of these ideas are my own and I made sure not to copy any of hers. )**

 **So sit back and relax as I write many different stories for many different characters and their hobbies, lives, and awkward moments. :D LOL**


	2. Gajeel The Mechanic

"Gajeel! Can you help me with the oven again?" Mira called to the Gruff Man as he stopped his meal to look up at her with a raised brow. He was in his usual spot in the guild, at that small table in the corner accompanied by both Pantherlily and Levy.

He swallowed his food before answering. "What? It's broken again?"

She nodded sadly. "I wish we could just get a new one, but unfortunately, we can't afford it..."

Levy and Lily shared a blank stare of confusion before watching the Iron Dragon Slayer sigh and stand up. "Yeah I got it. When I'm done you can just give me the usual."

Mira smiled and nodded. "Of course! Thank you again. I don't know what I'd do without your help."

He smirked as he walked past her. "Nah, it's no problem. Don't go and get mushy on me Barmaid."

As he walked into the kitchen, Levy and Lily looked over to Mirajane. Levy blinked. "Mira..? What was that all about?"

She blinked at them. "Oh? Has Gajeel never told you? Whenever something breaks around here, the guild pays him as our Mechanic to fix it."

The Solid Script Mage and Warrior Exceed's jaws hit the table. Levy looked down at the cat in her lap. "Lily?! Did you know about this?!"

He shook his head. "I had no idea! I was wondering where he kept getting extra money.., and he is very reliable when it comes to those kinds of things…"

Levy giggled. "As long as it's metal, huh?"

Lily nodded. "Pretty much."

Levy started to giggle, and somehow found herself unable to stop. Lily glanced up at her with a raised brow. "Levy? What are you laughing at?" He was truly curious, but wondered if maybe he should have left it alone.

She calmed herself down enough to be able to speak. "Well, you see, Gajeel can only fix something if it's metal, and I thought it was _**Iron**_ _-ic._ I mean, he is the Iron Dragon Slayer after all!" She started to laugh out loud and hit her hand on the table. Lily was even sure she had tears in her eyes as she continued.

Yup, he should have left it alone.

"Get it!? Iron-ic! Pffff-hahaha!" Lily only shook his head. He should have expected this. She was quite fond of wordplay. It took the bookworm a minute to finally calm down, but when she had, Gajeel used his perfect timing in that moment to walk up Mira.

"It should be fine now. It just had a screw loose." Levy covered her mouth to keep from laughing and failing as Mira nodded and thanked him with his pay before walking off. When Gajeel looked over at the two with a raised brow, he saw Levy trying not to laugh and Lily shaking his head. The Exceed briefly wondered if maybe the oven wasn't the only thing with a screw loose.

He raised a brow at them. "Uh..? What?" That was it for the Shrimp. She burst out laughing and started hitting the table again, making Gajeel flinch from the sudden outburst. "A screw! You said a screw! Hahahahaha!"

The Dragon Slayer changed his gaze to Lily, who understood his silent question but could only shake his head. "She seems to be in Pun Mode."

Gajeel grunted as he sat in his seat. "Oh great, last time she was like this, she laughed at everything I said. That's what I get for letting her find out I'm a mechanic..." As he thought, she laughed harder, managing to set Lily on the table before falling out of her chair laughing and clutching her stomach. "Mechanic! Pffff!"

Lily sighed. "Yes, I would have to say this is your fault. We better stop her."

Gajeel smirked. "Geehee. Or we could have fun with it." Lily raised a curious brow as he watched his friend stand and walk over to the laughing bluenette, squatting down to her level on the floor, a large smirk still spread across his face. Lily wondered if this was a bad idea as the Big Oaf spoke.

"Oi Shrimp, you better stop laughing now before you kick the _**can**_ and die. I mean, doncha have a _**bucket**_ list to finish first?"

Lily found himself chuckling at the jokes before watching the girl's reaction. She was laughing harder than ever before, rolling on the ground now. "Can!" She obviously couldn't control her laughing or breathing. "Bucket!" She continued to laugh uncontrollably, breathing maybe once or twice in five minutes.

This caused Gajeel to laugh and Lily wondered what he was going to do with the two of them. The cat smiled at the two in the end and decided to leave it be.

After all, Levy ended up in this position because of metal jokes.

So Gajeel should be able to fix it.

THE END

 **A/N: DON'T JUDGE ME. xD No, uh, this was really fun to write. 0.0 hope you enjoyed! ;v;**

 **HELP ME TvT**


	3. Infiltration of Fairy Hills

_Ahh~ Another glorious and sunny day in the city of Magnolia._ Thought one girl in particular as she skipped along the road towards the number one guild in Fiore. She was humming to herself happily when she finally reached the main entrance, already able to hear all of the ruckus and laughter. It made her smile, knowing that she'll be able to see her friend again after so long.

She burst the doors open. "ERZY WERZY!~"

Because of the sudden outburst, the entire guild stopped to look at the doorway, seeing before them a Mermaid Heel wizard, standing there and looking around for her friend, only to stop at the sight of Pantherlily. Her smile grew and you could see her eyes light up. "Kitty!"

Lily took a step back as she started running towards him. "Oh no-oof!" He was cut off by the hugging and squeezing coming from the women's affections.

"My Cat!" Gajeel grabbed Lily and pulled him out of her grip by force, pulling him close and giving her warning looks, causing her to glare at him and flail. "Give me back the Cute Kitty!"

The Iron Dragon Slayer growled, looking directly at the only wizard in the room that could talk any sense into the cat-loving girl. "Oi! Titania! Get this chick away from my cat!"

Said Titania was sitting a few tables over eating cake, only just now noticing the commotion around her as she looked up and blinked at the girl, almost dropping her fork. "Millianna!"

Millianna stopped her glaring contest with Gajeel to look over at her friend, smiling widely when she caught sight of her. "Er-chan!" She called as she ran over, giving Erza a big hug as soon as she had stood.

Erza hugged her back, smiling. "It's so good to see you! What are you doing here?"

She grinned as she pulled back. "I came to see you of course!"

As they sat down and continued to talk, a thought came to Erza. "Why don't you come to Fairy Hills and stay with me since you're in town?"

Millianna's smile grew. "Would that be okay? It sounds like a lot of fun!"

The redhead nodded. "Of course! Come, let me take you on a tour." She stood and Millianna followed, noticing a sleeping Exceed as they walked towards the doors. As she walked by, she picked him up to cuddle, making sure that she didn't wake him. Erza was already in Tour Mode as she went on and on about everything they passed on their way to the Women's Dorm, so she didn't notice that Millianna had taken the sleeping cat with her.

Only one person in the guild had noticed, but was too glad that it wasn't his own to care. "Ah, Gajeel?" The Iron Dragon Slayer glanced down at his Exceed. "Yeah?"

"You can put me down now…" Gajeel blinked. "Oh, right." And he did so, setting Lily down on the table. The small Warrior had just reached for his kiwi juice when he heard Natsu starting to yell.

"Hey, where's Happy!?" Lucy, who was sitting next to him at the table in front of Gajeel's put a hand on her chin. "Now that you mention it, I haven't heard his voice in a while."

After finishing his juice, Lily looked over at them and crossed his arms. "Millianna just took him with her to-" However, Lily couldn't finish as Natsu ran out of the doors yelling at nobody in particular as he went. "NOT MY LITTLE BUDDY!"

Lily blinked at the doors before scratching his head and turning to Gajeel. "You don't think he's going to…"

Gajeel swallowed what was left of his spoon before nodding. "Yup, he's a goner."

Natsu, who had been following Happy's scent, came to a halt in front of Fairy Hills' gate. He blinked up at the tall metal bars before grinning, his fist glowing with fire. "So ya think you can stop me, Stupid Bars?"

So, he started hitting away at the bars, yelling ridiculous attack names, only to come to the conclusion that they weren't being affected. He huffed and puffed as he glared up at them. In the end, he just climbed over the gate barehanded, landing on his face.

After twitching for a moment, he sat up quickly, hearing giggling in the distance. It sounded like Levy and Wendy, and they were coming his way. Feeling the sweat come on, he quickly ran towards the building and around the corner.

It took a minute, but it seemed that the two were heading to the guild as they walked out of the gate. He sighed in relief before looking around and finding an open window a few feet away. He smirked, moving his scarf to cover his mouth and nose and putting his hands together to make some kind of unknown handsign.

"I am a ninja!" He half whispered before climbing into the window somehow without using his hands. After landing, he narrowed his eyes and looked around, only to blink. "Holy cow, that's a lotta books!"

He was in some kind of library. he didn't even know there was one in Fairy Hills, but he couldn't think on it for long, he had to find his way to the door.

Many stomped on pages and crashed bookshelves latter…

The door was in view and he snicked to himself at the sight. "Da da da! Da dadada da da!" He started chanting to himself as he 'sneaked' out of the room, still not using his hands, and into the hallway.

"Da dadada da!" The fire Dragon Slayer/Ninja continued as the hallway was clear. He was about to turn a corner when he heard footsteps. "Hey, do you hear something?" That's Wendy!

"I don't think so…" And Carla! the sweat was returning and he made a dash for it, finding the first unlocked room and shutting it behind him. Natsu held his breathe when they walked by still chatting. Maybe he shouldn't sing his theme song out loud in the hallways...

When they were out of earshot, he sighed in relief again. That was close. Curiosity got the better of him as he looked around the room he was in, letting out a "GAH!" at the sight. Weird and random wooden statues with metal weapons and chains littered the entire room and lined the walls. Natsu, in total Freakout Mode, ran out of the room and down the hall yelling- "Why do they have a torture room in this place!?"

Loki, who had rounded the corner with some fresh wood in hand, missed Natsu by only a moment and blinked in thought. "Huh, that sounded a lot like Natsu... Oh well."

Said Dragon Slayer finally stopped to try and remember how to breathe normally again. What the heck is this place!? A Maze Library and a Torture Chamber? The pinkhead's ears started to twitch then.

"Come Millianna, now I'll take you to my room, the end of the tour and I'll serve some tea." Oh Crap it was Erza.

"Yay! Tea for me and the Kitty-Witty~" Ah, yes. The Catnapper.

"You know, you don't have to carry me anymore since I woke up…" Natsu's eyes widened. Happy!

At hearing his friend's voice, he was about to run in the direction of it when he realized _she_ was in the same place as Happy, stopping him in his tracks. Finding that they were right behind the corner, (Wow, this place had a lot of corners) he ran into the room next to him, blinking when he was standing in some kind of Armor Museum. Oh man, this was Erza's room…

With the sound of their voices getting closer, he quickly started looking for a place to hide. Any place...That will do!

Erza opened the door, leading them down what seemed to be a hallway rather than a room. "So this is my room. If you're wondering why it is so long, I have to rent five rooms in order to keep my armor…" She trailed off and stopped at a larger full suit of armor and stared at it for a moment.

Happy's jaw dropped, knowing full well that Natsu was inside of it. Not that they could see him all that well, but Happy knew by the smell that he was inside.., and he could see part of his face. If he wasn't so in shock, he most likely would have gave him away by yelling his name as loud as possible.

Millianna blinked at her friend. "Is something wrong Er-chan?"

After another moment of staring at the armor, the Requip Mage gave a small smile to the armor and rubbed the hemet with her hand. "Oh nothing, there was just a smudge."

If Happy's jaw could drop more than it was already, it would have hit the ground. After that, the three were on their way, going further down the hallway to where they couldn't be spotted anymore.

Natsu quickly, and somehow quietly, got out of the armor and took a deep breathe. Again, that was way too close. Looking both ways he went back into Ninja mode, putting his hands together and leaning against the wall, inching towards the others. When he reached the corner, he could see Erza's back and the front of Millianna with Happy in her lap. Natsu started making hand signals for the Exceed.

Said Exceed noticed his friend, narrowing his eyes and nodding, somehow being able to understand what he meant. The blue cat tried to get out of the girl's grip, but it was no use. He looked up at Natsu and shook his head.

Natsu pouted and put his hand to his chin as a thought came to mind. The Fire Wizard snickered to himself. He has always wanted to do this…

Happy was getting a bit worried. A few minutes had passed since he has last seen Natsu. Did he leave him behind? Or was he about to do something stupid?

It ended up being the second option.

"I AM THE WIZARD OF DARK FLAMES! FEAR MY FIRE AND SURRENDER THE EXCEED!" Happy was again put into shock as he took in the sight before him. Natsu was in one of Erza's suits of armor and he had come crashing into the room while spitting fire everywhere.

Erza wasn't too happy about this…

She had stood and turned around, ironically sharing the same look as Happy at the sight. Of course, after the shock had settled in, her eye started to twitch and her anger started to rise.

"...Requip…" Millianna and Happy started to shake at the deep voice and evil aura surrounding the redhead as she gave Natsu a death glare while wearing her Heavens Wheel Armor.

Natsu, who up until this point was going on a rampage, stopped short at seeing Titania before him in full anger. "E-E-Erza..?" Her swords started to appear around her. "C-Can't we talk about this..?" Okay, so maybe using her own armor against her to get Happy back by force wasn't the greatest idea.

"How dare you come in here...You are a male!" Happy and Millianna's jaw dropped and unknowingly thought the same thing. _That's what she's mad about!?_

"Heavens Wheel Armor..: Blumenblatt!"

"GAH!"

Happy started to cry bitterly at the obvious victory and the sight of his teammate on the floor twitching. "Next time, try to save me quietly Natsu…"

Still twitching, he was able to nod slightly. "Aye…"

THE END

 **A/N: LOL This was very,** _ **very**_ **entertaining to write. So I hope it was also entertaining to read. xD** **Oh and don't worry,** **only a Natsu was harmed in the writing of this fanfic.**


	4. The Thunder Legion's Play

"No."

"Please Laxus-kun!" Called Evergreen.

"No."

"B-But Laxus, the reward is large and-" Tried Freed.

"No."

"Aw, come on Laxus! It'll be fun!" Bickslow said while holding up the request paper as his babies chanted 'fun!', 'fun!'.

His eye was starting to twitch ever so slightly. "What part of 'no' did you not understand?"

" **The 'No' part.** " They flatly replied at the same time.

Laxus ran a hand down his face. He hated it when they all ganged up on him like this. When they did, it was only a matter of time before he would cave in. He looked at them from the corner of his eye. Oh great, they were giving him those looks again…

The Lightning Wizard groaned, knowing full well that he was going to regret this. "Alright…" Their faces started to light up as they cheered. At the sight of his friends happy, he smirked, taking the paper from Bickslow's hand. "Go home and get your things packed. We're heading to Onibus."

He just hoped he wouldn't regret it.

He walked over to the bar and was greeted with Mira's knowing smile. "Hello Laxus! Taking another job?" He nodded and handed her the slip of paper. She seemed surprised when she looked back up at him, but smiled all the same. "Very well, see you all when you get back!"

He gave a wave as he left but grunted when he heard her giggling. That sound was always a sign that she was about to stir up some mischief. He only sighed though as he walked away. There wasn't a way to stop her anyways.

The train ride wasn't all that bad, or rather, wasn't that eventful. Freed was remembering the last time he had been to the town accompanying Wendy and shared the story, Bickslow only tripped one waiter in the Food Car, Evergreen had only spent an hour hogging the bathroom to 'beautify' herself, and Laxus stayed as calm as always, barely moving from his seat the entire trip.

Soon enough, they made it off of the train and were now walking the the streets of Onibus. It didn't take long for them to reach their destination. Freed smiled. "It's as glorious as I remember."

Evergreen rolled her eyes. "From what I remember, you didn't even go inside." The light-green headed man pouted in response. Bickslow only laughed at him and Laxus ignored all of them as he headed towards the door. "Let's just get this over with…"

They followed close behind him until he stopped. Peeking around their leader, the Raijinshuu blinked at the sight of the small man in the doorway. "Are you the Fairy Tail wizards..? I was expecting the other four."

Laxus nodded. "Yes, we're here to fill your request."

"Hmmm." The short man sighed. "Yes, well, you'll have to do…" As the director walked inside, signalling them to follow, Lazus' eye was twitching in irritation. He didn't even want to be here and this guy didn't seem to want them there, so why not just leave?

The Lightning Dragon Slayer glanced back at his team. They were smiling like idiots. He sighed and walked inside. Wow, he was becoming such a sap.

When inside what seemed to be a dressing room they all sat down and listened to the director. "Thank you very much!" They all blinked at him and Bickslow was about to comment when he decided to continue. "You see, all of my regular actors quit on me after they saw the performance done by your guild. And because your guildmates left, I've run out of actors and thus haven't been able to put on anymore performances..."

Freed felt pity for the man. "That's terrible!" The short man seemed on the verge of tears. "Thank you very much!"

 _For what!?_ They all thought at the same time as he finished. "So I sent out another request in hopes that I could put on another brilliant performance!" They nodded slowly. Laxus crossed his arms. "Alright then, we'll do it in a week."

"Really..?" He looked rather hopeful, but when Laxus nodded in confirmation, he looked away from them with a disappointed grunt. "Heh, whatever, if you say so." There was a slight crackling noise as Laxus' irritation started to rise. _Do you want us here or not old man!?_

After that, the week of preparations began. Evergreen managed the costumes, Freed helped them all memorize their lines, Bickslow handled spreading out the flyers, and Laxus helped with everything in between. It seemed that everything was going smoothly and the day of the performance had finally arrived.

Bickslow peeked at the audience from behind the curtain. "Whoa! Thatsa lotta people!"

"People! People!" His babies cried. Freed looked nervous. "I-I don't think I thought this through very well…"

Ever rolled her eyes. "Please, you've done nothing all week _but_ think!"

Laxus walked up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Don't be thinkin' about givin' up on me now. I was dragged into this by you morons, so we're doing it together, got me?" They looked up and smiled at him. "Right."

He smirked. "Good, now lets go rock the house."

"Right!" Bickslow looked out of the curtain again and froze. The leader of the group noticed and frowned. "Bickslow, don't tell me you're nervous too…"

He shook his head and pointed outside. "Not..,exactly…" Laxus raised a brow as he walked over and looked out at the audience where his friend had pointed, only to also freeze on the spot. In the very front row sat Mira, Makarov, Team Natsu, Wendy and that little white cat that's always with her.

Again, his eye started to twitch as Mira noticed him and gave him that knowing smile. This was her doing… He glanced to the right to look at his grandfather. He was grinning from ear to ear. Great, now Laxus would never hear the end of it when this is over.

He sighed and closed the curtain as their hirer came up to them. "Alright everyone! Get to your places the show is about to start! Thank you very much!" And he was off again. Over the past week the four just decided to ignore the last phrase altogether.

After getting in place, the lights dimmed and everyone quieted down. Soon enough, the curtain opened and a light was centered to the middle of the stage, showing Evergreen tied to a chair. She was dressed as a princess.

"Oh woe is me, who was captured by the evil Dark Knight Vandoth. When will my Prince come rescue me?" The audience was surprised to Evergreen actually shed a tear. Leave to her to have such eye skills. She was a great actress.

Another light was shown to her right, revealing Bickslow, dresses in a knight costume. It wasn't much different than what he usually wore, actually. He had his arms crossed and was smirking evilly at her. "Foolish and naive Princess! No prince shall come for you!"

That's when the entire stage lit up and Freed walked out and up to Bickslow, pointing his sword out at him. A minute went by and you could see that the young prince was shaking and trying to say something, but couldn't.

Evergreen would have facepalmed if she wasn't tied up. So instead she whispered. "Say something!"

In the audience, Natsu was laughing his head off at seeing some of his strongest Nakama doing something as silly as this, Lucy was wondering why the director made the play so similar to theirs, Erza was on the verge of tears because she thought it was beautiful, Gray didn't show what he was feeling and only watched with a raised brow, Wendy was cheering Freed on since he had helped her with her job to this very place, Mira was also cheering him on, and Makarov was wondering where Laxus was.

Bickslow, the good friend that he is, when along with it and smirked. "What? Are ya scared?" Out of pure instinct, Freed shot back. "I most certainly am not!" Then covered his mouth to look at the audience in silent fear that he hadn't followed the script and therefore ruined the play.

The 'Dark Knight' smirked wider. "Well alright then! Take this! Babies, come forth!" For the play, Bickslow had moved his souls into three shields. They lined up right in front of the Green-haired prince, who at this moment was terrified that he had messed up the script, since this wasn't suppose to happen until after three more scenes. So Freed took his sword and, while still shaking, poked the first shield, which made to bump into the other two and like dominos fell to the ground seemingly lifeless.

"That was way to easy!" Called the audience and louder laughs could be heard from Natsu's direction.

"Oh No!" Bickslow cried. "Not my babies! Fine! If you want a greater opponent, you can fight my Lightning Dragon!" There were fireworks and crackling as the stage became so bright that the audience had to look away a moment, when they looked back, they were shocked.

Standing in between Freed and Bickslow, and in front of Evergreen, was Laxus Dreyar with his arms crossed. He was completely normal. Purple shirt, dark jeans, fur coat, and extremely bored expression.

Bickslow's stretched out pointed finger started to twitch. "Ah Lightning Dragon..? Where are your scales, and ya know, tail?"

"I wouldn't be caught dead in such a stupid outfit."

Evergreen started to squirm, looking angry. "It took me all week to make that! It was perfection!"

"It was stupid."

The audience started to laugh and nod. This was the Fairy Tail play they were expecting.

Laxus looked to Freed and put out his two fingers before nugging them towards himself, indicating that he was ready to fight. Freed, on the other hand, had decided that this was no longer a play. And because of that decision, had decided that this was just being them. And if this was just being them, then he would never be able to fight Laxus.

He dropped his sword and the fans gasped. Freed couldn't help but stutter. "I-I-I-I-I-I-I-" He was shaking more than usual, then he just started to run off stage altogether, yelling over his shoulder. "I COULD NEVER HURT YOU!"

Laxus blinked, not expecting such a reply. The people off-stage could only let their jaws drop. "What kind of prince was that!?"

The Lightning Mage looked over at Bickslow, who had facepalmed, and then to Ever, who understood what he was asking. "Oh no! Now who shall save me from the clutches of this evil Knight!?"

"Their still going through with this!?" Called the people in shock.

Bickslow went back to a proud stance. "Hahaha! I've won! No one shall beat me now!" He continued to laugh until he felt a new surge of magic, stopping mid-chuckle.

"Wonna bet?"

Laxus had spiked his magic power and you could see the Lightning coming off of him was he took a step closer. Bickslow twitched and then after taking a step back, also ran off stage yelling "Screw this!"

The audience was put into shock again. Anybody who had decided to take a drink before that scene had most certainly spit it right back out. This had included Gray, Lucy and Happy. Makarov was cheering very loudly towards his grandson. Everyone else was wondering how he had gotten the lead role in this production.

So after uniting the princess, he picked her up in his arms, still holding that same bored look as she said her last lines. "Oh thank you kind dragon for saving me! I shall always be in your debt!"

"Yeah, yeah. Just make me some food when we get home." Was his only reply as he walked off stage, leaving the audience in complete and utter shock at what they had just witnessed. Then of course Natsu was the one to break the silence.

"Holy Crap that was awesome! HAhahaha!" Soon the whole audience was with him, cheering and laughing.

"Amazing! I want to watch it again!"

"What a twist ending!"

The director came out to see and hear that everyone had loved it. He started to tear up and flail. "Thank you very much!" The four that were behind stage now could only let there jaw drop. _Oh_ now _he says it at the right time!_ But it was soon over their heads as they walked out on stage and bowed.

Laxus looked at his Grandfather and saw exactly what he thought he would. The Old Geezer was crying. He only sighed, but couldn't help the small smile from spreading on his face.

Okay, so maybe being in a stupid play wasn't as stupid as he thought it was.

But as he expected...When they all got home everyone wouldn't let him live it down. They all kept doing stupid things like cheering and reenacting scenes. Once at the bar of the guild, he glared at Mira, who noticed and smiled right back, giggling. "Hello Laxus! Taking a break from signing autographs?"

His eye started to twitch again. "It's not funny Mira. I'm getting really tired of this. Why did you have to bring them to see us?"

She turned to finish organizing some letters, but he knew that she was still smiling. "Silly, I wasn't the one who brought them."

He blinked, surprised. "You weren't?"

She turned back around. "No, Master was the one after I told him about what job you took!"

He slammed his fist on the bar, irritation showing on his face. "So you did start it!"

She merely put a hand to her mouth. "Teehee!~"

"Don't 'teehee' me!"

"Heehee!~"

"That's just as bad!"

The other three had just finished talking with some guildmates about the play and looked over at their leader. Ever shook her head. "I wonder when he'll realize he'll never win with Mira…"

Bickslow smirked. "He probably won't."

"Probably! Probably!"

Freed sighed. "It's true. She is the She Devil to the core.., That much is certain."

They all nodded in agreement, before deciding to walk over and try to help. So their play didn't go as they had planned, but it happened to be really fun and also helped their leader get some more fans. Which was their goal all along.

What else did you expect from the Thunder Legion?

THE END

 **A/N: MUHAHAHAHA! I loved this so much. I thought of the idea and my brother helped me with some parts so it turned out perfect. xD**

 **Thanks to everyone who has given a review or followed or faved! Your support means so much to me. ;v; See you soon in the next chapter!**


	5. How Wizards Sulk

Q: How do wizards sulk?

Lets find out.

Natsu: The one who stops thinking altogether, to the point that he would walk into the same wall over and over again and never notice because he would be to depressed to care.

Gray: Would pretend to be fine but because his mind is on whatever upset him, he would forget to strip, indicating to everyone around him that something had to be wrong.

Lucy: Would lock herself in her room, including bolting the window shut, and try to come up with a solution by herself while trying not to be depressed.

Erza: Would spend all of her money on cake and cry and eat at the same time.

Mira: Would put on a smile in public but would cry and complain to her sister at home.

Elfman: Admit that having problems was manly while crying before trying to fix it and apologise.

Lisanna: Would hold it all in and gain the courage to confront the person only to cry in the process of doing so.

Jet: Cry on Droy's shoulder.

Droy: Cry on Jet's shoulder.

Levy: be depressed for a while before reading a book to help comfort her and then going to Lucy and ranting.

Gajeel: Get grumpier than usual but get upset when by himself, most likely in tears.

Juvia: Lock herself away for a few days to cry her eyes out before somebody would have to come get her.

Lily: Drink as much kiwi juice as possible.

Happy: Fish. Fish is the only thing the Blue Exceed would be able to see in his depression .., and maybe Carla.

Carla: Hide that she was upset before ending up cracking under Wendy's worried gaze.

Wendy: Would cry because she would blame herself and eat everything with any sugar in it.

Cana: Would try and get drunk. Then cry when it dosen't work.

Gildarts: Drink and cry at a picture of Cana that he somehow managed to obtain.

Laxas: Please! Nothing phases Laxas!... (He would go to Makarov for advice.)

Evergreen: Put on more makeup than usual, and would most likely sigh a lot.

Freed: Sit in a corner with his arms wrapped around his knees while swaying and mumbling to himself.

Bickslow: Get irritated and cross his arms stubbornly like a child at everything.

Lyon: Get so shocked that he wouldn't move from his spot as if frozen in place. Then after someone snapped him out of it, he would get all frantic and run around like a chicken with it's head cut off while hyperventilating.

Meredy: Would get snappy and more sarcastic until she was apologized to.

Jellal: Would lock himself in a closet with a few tubs of Ice Cream, likely to not come out until they were all empty.

THE END

 **A/N: I regret nothing.**


	6. A Day in the Life of Crime Sorciere

"Meredy...I have a question."

The pinkette blinked up at her independent guild creator. "Yes Jellal?"

He glanced at her from the corner of his eye. "When we had ran into Lamia Scale last week... you seemed to know that Lyon character very well."

She blinked, not really understanding where he was going with the conversation. "Well, yes. He's a friend of Juvia's. We also happened to fight together after the Grand Magic Games. We've been friends of sorts since then."

He nodded slowly. "I see…"

Silence followed after that and it was starting to worry Meredy. What could possibly be going through his head at that moment? She knew better. Jellal was obviously being curious about her relationships. She sighed. Weather she liked it or not, he was the closest thing to a brother she had, and he was proving it with his behavior. "Speaking of, Jellal…"

"Hm?"

"Why are we going to Magnolia?"

She saw him tease at the question, but for only a second as he continued to walk a bit ahead of her. "O-Oh, nothing really, I thought it would be nice to visit Fairy Tail."

She narrowed her eyes and raised a brow. He was obviously hiding something. "Even though we're fugitives..?"

He turned his head to give her a reassuring smile. "No need to worry. I asked the Master a few days ago if we could visit and he approved."

She blinked. Oh, so that was where he had went the other day. She continued to narrow her eyes. He was still being suspicious. She sighed again and decided to let it go.

As long as he didn't do anything stupid then she knew everything would be fine.

Putting up their hoods, they walked into the city and avoided as many people as possible on their way to the guild hall. Soon enough, they made it to the doors and opened them. When they walked inside and shut the doors, everyone had stopped to stare.

Now they both looked suspicious...

Meredy sighed before glancing around. Then she smiled widely at the sight of a certain Water Mage and ran over to tackle her to the ground with a hug. "Juvia!" In the process of the incident, her hood had flown back to reveal her long pink hair.

Juvia blinked as she sat up. "M-Meredy!?" The girl nodded as she leaned back and smiled. "It's been forever!"

After blankly looking at her face for a minute, Juvia rubbed her eyes before blinking at her again. Then a large smile spread on her face as she gave her a hug of her own. "Juvia has missed you so much!" Meredy started to giggle at her friend's reaction while patting her back, forgetting that there was an audience.

Gray, who had been standing next to Juvia before she was tackled, blinked up from the two to look across the room at the other figure. "Wait, it that's Meredy than that means.."

Erza walked up to the other person and was about to question him when he put his hood down, showing her a smile. "Ah good, you're here."

The redhead blinked and most of the guild, mostly the girls, watched intensly as the two locked eyes. "Jellal...W-What are you do-" She was cut off however as he took her wrist and dragged her out of the guild faster than she could squeal.

Speaking of squealing…

That's what Mira and Lucy were doing right now. "IT MUST BE A CONFESSION!" Lisanna, who had somehow gotten herself stuck between the two, blinked and was very lost. "Did I miss something?"

Meanwhile, Jellal had dragged poor Erza outside and when she went to ask about it as they stopped, words seemed to falter at the shock of seeing her childhood friend crouch down to the street's ground and looking from side to side as if he was making sure the cops weren't around.

She blinked at him and also crouched down to his level. "J-Jellal..?"

Suddenly his gaze snapped to her and he let go of her hand to put both of his in a begging position. "Please, Erza! I need your help."

Her surprized look didn't change. "Help..? With what?"

He looked around again and then back to her, leaning in like he was sharing a secret. "You see..,there is someone I need to catch and question…" She blinked at him as he continued. "He's stolen something valuable and I need to talk to him."

Erza only raised a brow, but was becoming more and more curious. "How can I help..?"

"I need directions, a distraction for Meredy, and a team."

She stared at him for a long moment as the questions in her head started to pile up. It took her a moment before she decided to ask one. "I can get you a team and I can ask Juvia to distract Meredy, but I need to know where you think we're going to tell you directions. Also, why aren't we just going to take her with us?"

"She can't know about this."

"Why not?"

"She doesn't realize that it was stolen."

He just wasn't making any sense and it was making the poor redhead even more confused than she was before.. "What exactly _was_ stolen?"

At the mere thought of whatever it was, his face took on one of pure shame and agony as he fell on his hands and knees, whispering. "Her heart…"

She blinked, leaning in a bit. "What?"

He sighed and sat up, dragging a hand down his face. "I wasn't paying enough attention and without my realization, he had taken her heart…" She was about to respond, but his face changed into one of fiery determination and a grin, causing her to flinch in fear as he continued. "But I won't allow it. Not until I've at least talked to him and he's proven himself worthy!"

She was starting to see the big picture. "So what you're saying is that Meredy's heart was stolen, yet she doesn't realize it, and you want to confront the man and see if he is worthy of her?"

Just when she thought he was going to start laughing evilly, his face turned back to normal as he nodded. "That's right."

She thought a moment, putting a hand to her chin and glancing at him. "So why don't you want her to know about this?"

He glanced away, almost looking guilty. "I...don't want her to be mad at me…"

She sighed, trying hard not to facepalm, but found herself smiling. "Alright then." She stood. "I'll get everything in order." Then she looked down at him with curiosity. "Who is this guy anyway?"

He also stood and turned to her. "Lyon Vastia from Lamia Scale. That's why I need directions, I don't know where their guild hall is located."

She stared at him, not expecting that the situation would become so ironic. "Ah..,about that…"

"JUVIA-CHAN!~"

Speak of the devil and he shall appear.

Erza turned to see Jellal with a shocked expression. "He...was coming to visit today." She briefly wondered where his calm demeanor went, but then again, he was obviously in Brother Stressout Mode.

As Lyon was about to run into the guild, Jellal seemed to come back to his senses, turning to Erza calmly. "I still need to speak with him."

Erza, in full understanding of the situation, nodded. "Alright."

And so, both sped around the corner. Lyon had just opened the doors and was about to yell Juvia's name again when some kind of divine intervention, or in this case, a crack fanfic writer, caused him to seemingly disappear from sight, only leaving a slight breeze go throughout the room left behind by the two fast mages in their Ice-Mage-napping, making everyone in the guild wonder where the wind had come from.

Juvia and Meredy, who had been sitting at the bar talking, blinked over at the doors before Meredy raised a brow, narrowing her eyes at the doors, which was still open from the 'wind'. "Jellal?"

Juvia thought a moment, taking her question literally. "Maybe Jellal-san is with Erza-san."

Meredy shook her head as she pointed to the doors. "No, I mean I think that was Jellal.."

Gray walked up next to them with a raised brow as he cleaned out his ear. "I could've swore I heard Lyon just now... Well, he was suppose to come over today for some reason. Wonder what happened."

The two girls shared a glance before getting up with a nod. They were going to find out.

Now we go back to Lyon, who at the moment, was wondering what on earth he did to deserve such attention. For standing over him in an alley about a block away from Fairy Tail's guild hall was Erza Scarlet and Jellal Fernandes, both giving his stern looks. They had just kidnapped him.

What had he done to deserve this..?

The Ice Mage decided to turn to Erza, who he had known longer. "E-Erza? What is this about?" He took into consideration that he could have taken a nap and this was the nightmare that had come from it, but he knew better, this was really happening. He just didn't understand _why_ it was happening.

She crossed her arms cooly but offered a smile. "No need to be nervous. Jellal just wants to talk to you."

Lyon switched his gaze to the blue headed man and stood up with a raised brow. "Have I done something wrong..?" It was meant as a joke because of Jellal's independent guild's purpose, but the man in front of him didn't change his calm, almost serious expression.

"Not exactly. As Erza has said, I just want to talk."

Lyon blinked, curious now. What would he want to talk about with him..? "What is it then?"

"It's about Meredy."

His eyes widened a bit in surprise and confusion. "Meredy?"

"What do you mean, 'Meredy'?"

All three turned to the third voice, seeing with wide eyes that the topic of choice was standing before them with Juvia and Gray, who had decided to join her, were by her side. Her arms were crossed and she looked pretty ticked off.

Jellal started to visibly sweat and stutter. "M-M-Meredy!? What are you doing here?!"

"Lyon!?" Gray pointed a finger at him in surprize.

"Gray!?" Lyon reflected his actions, but soon turned his gaze over to a very angry Meredy, debating running for his life.

She stomped up to Jellal, putting her fist to her sides and getting in his face. "What do you mean 'what am I doing here'!? I would like to know what you _think_ you're doing. I knew it too, I knew you were acting suspicious...So tell me. What do you think Lyon has to do with me?"

Juvia, and her overactive imagination, spoke in excitement before Jellal could even gather the courage to open his mouth. "Does Meredy love Lyon-sama!?"

The two said teens blushed and automatically looked to one another, deepening their blush. Lyon, too shocked to speak, just stared at the girl in front of him. Said girl started to shake from embarrassment and anger, looking to Jellal, who flinched under her gaze. Erza was beginning to understand why her friend didn't want to make Meredy angry...

"You..You.." Her voice was low and her gaze sharp. "Is that what you think!?"

Jellal, regretting his decision to go through with this, was beyond nervous. "W-Well, isn't it the t-t-truth..?!"

"No you moron! I like him as a friend! Maybe even a close friend, but nothing more!" She had yelled in his face and he was shocked to stone that his calculations were wrong.

After screaming in frustration and embarrassment, she stormed off, Juvia and Lyon following her to try and calm her down. Jellal watched and while still in shock, fell to his hands and knees.

Gray was standing next to Erza. He blinked at what had just unfolded. "What...just happened? Will Jellal be okay..?" The said man looked pretty out of it in his 'epic fail' position in the alleyway.

Erza sighed and then gave a small smile. "Just another day in the life of Crime Sorciere." She then looked to Jellal with amusement in her features before walking away. "I'm sure he'll be fine. From what I understand, it isn't the first time he's made her angry."

He nodded slowly before following her. "I almost feel sorry for 'im, but then again, maybe he deserved it."

"He definitely had it coming." She replied calmly.

He sighed. "Great, now I get to hear Meredy's complaining, Juvia's fantasies, and Lyon's nonsense…"

She laughed as she opened the guilds doors. "Just bear through it, I don't think Meredy will stay mad for much longer."

He sighed. "I hope not…" Just then, Juvia started clinging to his arm. "Gray-sama! Juvia is so happy you're here!"

"Juvia-chan! Don't cling to him like that! He doesn't deserve it!" Called Lyon, now standing next to them.

Meredy, also standing next to them, turned her glare to Gray. "You're right Lyon, he doesn't deserve it. Juvia deserves much better."

As the three continued to argue with Gray in the middle, the younger Ice Mage turned to look at Erza a few tables away from them. "Erza! Help me!"

She didn't even look his way as she picked up her spoon. "I'm sorry Gray, but I'm in the middle of eating my cake, please deal with the situation on your own."

Jellal walked in about then, calmly sitting down next to Erza. Gray decided to call out to him. "Hey! Jellal, a little help here!?"

Jellal also didn't turn as he sipped his fresh cup of tea that Mira had just kindly brought him. "I'm sorry Gray, but I've already made Meredy mad at me today, so I'll leave her to you. I'm sure you can handle it." Erza nodded as she took a bite of cake at the same time he took a sip of tea.

His jaw dropped to the floor. "YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!"

THE END

 **A/N: LOL XD Special thanks to OverObsessedFangirl8804 for helping me with the ideas for this chapter! I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did writing it! ;v;**

 **I felt like I was putting Jellal a bit out of character so I'm sorry if that was the case for you guys as well. OTL**

 **Also, I think I have too much fun torturing Jellal and Gray. XD Pffff!**

 **Thanks for reading!**


	7. Juvia's Mishap

Juvia, our favorite Water Mage, scanned the bar for a certain longhaired man and smiled when he was found. Walking over, she took the seat next to what she had claimed to be one of her closest friends. She glanced over at him, trying not to look excited. "Did you find it Gajeel-kun?"

He smirked and slid a piece of paper across the counter over to her. "Who do you take me for Rain Woman? It was easy."

She let out an excited squeal, making Gajeel wince, as she took it. "Wonderful! Juvia is so happy you found it since the other shop owner is nowhere to be found!"

He narrowed his eyes at her in question. "What exactly...did ya want the info for..?"

She blinked over at him, the 'duh' factor in her voice as she spoke. "All is for Gray-sama!"

He hit his fist onto the countertop. "I knew it! You're gonna buy some messed up love potion again ain't ya!?" He had given her the information last time she had done this, but he never asked what she was going to do with the location of a potion shop. He had a mission that day, when she had ended up using it on almost all of their guildmates. Happy had told Lily what had happened and thus when it came to Gajeel's ears, well to put it frank he couldn't stop laughing, but after that he was just glad he wasn't there to end up a victim.

She narrowed her eyes in response to his outburst and crossed her arms. "If Gajeel-kun must know, Juvia is going to use a potion on herself."

He blinked. "What? I thought you said it was for the Stripper..?"

"Juvia is going to change herself for Gray-sama."

He just gave her a blank stare. It took several minutes for him to gather his reply, getting more and more irritated. "Not happening."

Her eyes narrowed more as she pouted in anger. "Why not!?"

His fist found the poor, now cracked, countertop again. "You don't know what'll happen! What if it's permanent!? Or does something weird to ya!?"

Her smile suddenly grew as her eyes gained a new sparkle. "Gajeel-kun cares!~"

To his embarrassment, he could feel his blush. "S-Shut it! You're changin' the subject! Give me back that address!" He reached for it, but she dodged. This continued and the two soon stood up with Gajeel yelling and cursing while chasing Juvia around the guild hall.

Not long after, Gajeel was able to grab her by the arms and bring her to him. As he held her down for just a second, the piece of paper almost in his grasp, she turned her body into water, falling to the floor, creating a big splash.

He twitched at being all wet before stomping his foot. "I freakin' hate it when you do that!" He heard her giggling and turned his twitching gaze to see her a few feet behind him, paper still in hand.

After another round of chasing, he grew too angry and stopped, breathing heavily, before stomping out of the guild. "Fine! Do whatever ya want! Don't come cryin' to me when it turns you inta somthin' wacky!" Lily, who had been watching and chuckling from the sidelines like everyone else in the guild, followed his partner out the door.

Juvia grinned at her victory before skipping out of the guild, feeling slightly guilty that she had made Gajeel mad at her, but her desire for Gray-sama to look at her with passion in his eyes made her doubts wash away.

Gray, who was one of the many people to behold the scene, suddenly had a chill go down his spine. "Ah no…"

Natsu, who had noticed, raised a brow, speaking with his mouth full. "Whatsa matter Ice Cube?"

Gray shook his head. "It's nothing...I hope…" A minute passed as a vain slowly grew on his forehead. "Who are ya calling Ice Cube, Frame-for-Brains!?"

Lucy sighed as they started to fight. "I think I better stay home tomorrow…"

A FEW HOURS LATER

"So you want a potion to change your personality then?" Said the old woman who ran the shop that Juvia had just arrived to. The Water Mage nodded, looking quite determined and eager, ignoring the storm that was going on outside.

The old shopkeeper nodded and started scanning the long shelves of different colored and shaped bottles, her hand hovering over them as she walked until she stopped. "Ah...here we are."

She took a green bottle off of the shelf and handed it to Juvia carefully. "Here deary. This will change your personality for 12 hours, but I can't determine what kind of person you'll turn into. Remember to drink every drop."

Juvia smiled widely as she took the potion as thunder struck, flashing her face through the window. "Thank you so much! Juvia is fine as long as she's not Juvia for a while…" She had determined that her Gray-sama finds her creepy and scary. Therefore the problem must be within herself. If so, then this should work out for the better.

After walking all the way back to Fairy Hills in the storm grinning like a weirdo in the dark rainy night, she ran into her room as fast as she could and shut the door behind her with a slam. Trying not to manically laugh too loudly, she opened the bottle and began to drink.

The lightning flashed through the window to show her shadow drinking the potion. Soon after she had finished, she fell to her knees and winced. The change was strange but her determination overlooked anything else. Her eyes started to grow heavy as she fought sleep. After a moment, the overwhelming feeling grew and she was out, the thunder not even waking her until she woke up the next morning.

AT THE GUILD THE NEXT DAY

Gray glanced around the room. Something was off...strange even, but he couldn't pinpoint it. Something was definitely wrong though. Almost missing. Yeah, that was it. Something was missing. He glanced around again before it hit him.

He turned to Lucy, who was sitting across from Natsu. "Have you seen Juvia today?"

The blonde thought a moment before shaking her head. "No I haven't. What about you Natsu? Have you seen Juvia?"

The pinkette stuffing his face swallowed before raising a brow. "What are you guys talking about? She's right over there." He pointed what looked like a chicken wing towards the guilds doors, which were now open with the Water Mage standing in the doorway.

"Drip, drip, drop." She said quietly as she walked in, soaking wet because of the constant rain outside, but she didn't seem to care.

The three watched silently as she walked over to the farthest end of the bar to sit quietly, which wasn't that far from their table. She looked almost...depressed. Lucy winced at the sight and then narrowed her eyes at Gray. "Did you do something to Juvia?"

He blinked and took offense. "I haven't done anything!"

She didn't look convinced, but let it go, frowning. "Well, maybe you should go talk to her. She looks really sad."

He narrowed his eyes at his teammate. "Why don't you go talk to her then if you're so worried?"

She mimicked his look. "One, don't act like you're not worried, and two, if I go talk to her she'll start the whole 'love rival' thing."

He was about to make some kind of comeback when he noticed something. He stopped and slowly turned his head. "Lucy...Where'd Flame Brain go..?"

She also stopped and looked at the empty seat where the Fire Dragon Slayer once was. "Uh…"

"Water Lock!"

They both stiffened and slowly turned around to see and irritated Natsu trying to yell in Juvia's Water Lock. Lucy face palmed. "Oh no…" Gray started laughing beside her and she grinned, standing up to go behind him while he was distracted before pushing him as hard as she could forward.

As he landed on his face in front of Juvia, who had stood to unleash her attack, Natsu turned all of the water around him into steam and landed on his feet, flailing at the Water Mage. "What did ya do that for!?"

"Drip, drip, drop."

Gray, after groaning, stood and somehow lost his shirt in the process. He looked over at his crazy blue haired friend only to blink in surprise. Flashbacks of their first meeting started going through his head. Her hair was straight with curled ends and her outfit was the same as that time before she was a Fairy Tail wizard. He locked eyes with her and regretted it. They were cold and empty, holding no emotion. He gulped. "Juvia..?"

Her reaction wasn't what he was use to. She didn't squeal his name or call out in a fantasy, just stared at him for a moment before looking away and sitting back down. His jaw dropped as Natsu voiced his own thoughts at the same time as Gray did. " **She ignored me!?** " Though the Dragon Slayer was only talking about how Juvia ignored his own question.

Lucy, who was only a table away, spit out her drink before running out of the guild in fear. "JUVIA IGNORED GRAY!? THE WORLD MUST BE ENDING! I KNEW I SHOULD'VE STAYED HOME TODAY!"

Gray swallowed his fears and started walking towards her, making it to the seat next to her and sat down. If he had done this yesterday, she would've started to do that crazy fangirling and clung to him while talking about thirty-three babies or something. However, he was only met with silence.

Two minutes went by.

Five minutes went by.

Finally, after the ten minute mark, he was about to say something when she spoke, stiffening at how low, cold, and lifeless it was. "Want do you want from Juvia?" She glared over at him and it made him flinch.

"I-I. Uh. Um. J-Just-" He stuttered in his shock until she glared at him, stopping him altogether. How could she even pull such a dark look off? He was totally confused until the solution finally came to mind.

Ah, Erza must have knocked him out again. That would explain everything. This was a dream, right? A dream that turned into a nightmare because he keeps holding off on Juvia's affections.

But it was so real.

Because it was real.

"Juvia doesn't have time to waste with you, so if you wouldn't mind, please refrain from talking to her. Its annoying."

His jaw dropped again. What was going on? Was this some kind of punishment? What had he done to deserve this? More than anything right now, he wanted the old Juva back, because the one before him now was way scarier than the one he had avoided yesterday.

In his pure state of shock, the Ice Mage didn't notice Natsu come up and start dragging him over to the table and started shaking him. "Yo Ice Princess! You gotta do somethin'!"

Gray, after snapping back to his senses, pushed Natsu's arms off and pointed at the Water Mage behind them. "I don't even know if that's really Juvia or not!"

Natsu shook his head. "No it's her alright. Same scent and everything...but it's weird. I'm picking up somethin' else…"

Gray blinked, refocusing on Natsu. "Something else?"

He nodded. "Have no idea what though, but it smells weird."

The Ice Mage sighed in defeat before leaning on the table. "What should we do then..?" He felt pretty pathetic for asking _Natsu_ for advice, but at the same time he's run out of options.

The Fire User thought a moment, long and hard before opening his eyes. "You know, when she attacked me, the water tasted the same as that weird smell, I think it was coming from the water. Like it was mixed with it."

Gray sat back up. "Yeah? What about it?"

Natsu grinned. "Maybe if we make her use all of her water, then she'll turn back to normal!"

Gray sighed. "Stupid. She'll just reuse her water by using her magic."

"Not if I make it turn inta steam, or ya freeze it."

Gray thought over that for a moment before standing up. "Alright, It's not like we have any other choice."

The two turned to her and tapped her shoulders with confidence. She turned in her chair to glare at them with her sharp gaze. "What?"

Whatever courage the two may have had a minute ago seemed to disappear in a blink of an eye as they stared into hers. How could their usually happy-go-lucky friend become as scary as Erza..? Before a word came out of their mouths, Natsu did the smartest thing he thought of and pushed Gray forward. "Ya see, Gray wanted ta pick a fight with ya! S-So I'll just be goin' and stuff. Aye!" And he ran out of the guild. "LEAVE THE WINDOW UNLOCKED FOR ME LUCY!"

"Fight?"

Gray, again in the state of shock, was looking out of the doors where Natsu had ran out of when she spoke. He turned nervously back to see Juvia looking at the ground. Then she stood, making him flinch, and looked up with a new kind of determination in her eyes. "Alright."

He blinked, knowing he was growing paler by the second. "Alright..?"

"Drip, drip, drop. Water Slicer."

"AHHHH! I HATE YOU NATSU!"

ON THE STREETS OF MAGNOLIA

"Stupid rain…"

"Gajeel, if you're worried, just say so." Pantherlily said while riding his comrade's shoulder. It was amusing watching the Big Oaf pace in his apartment all morning before he had finally decided to head towards the Guild Hall, not seeming to care that he was going to get wet.

They were almost there when Gajeel growled his reply. "I ain't worried alright? I just need some food in my stomach since we're out again." Lily rolled his eyes in response.

When they had come to the doors, yelling and loud smashing could be heard. The two glanced to one another before Gajeel opened the door, his jaw dropping at the sight before him.

The guild was halfway destroyed. Tables and chairs were sliced into pieces. Cut marks covered the walls and pillars. There wasn't many guild members in the room, most likely left as soon as the fight started. Everything was covered in water and ice, and standing in the middle of it all was a obviously tired Juvia and Gray.

After blinking in surprise, Gajeel started to walk over when Juvia suddenly got angry and started attacking Gray, who yelped and started running away.

"What the h-" He was cut off by Lily, who had whacked him in the head. "No cursing Gajeel, the writer rated this story K plus."

"What's the plus for then!?"

"Saftey."

Gajeel growled. "Heck then. What. The. Heck."

So he watched for a moment until he looked around the room again. Almost everyone had left to save themselves. He noticed Erza in the corner of the room and pointed at the maham. "Oi! Titania! Shouldn't you be doin' somethin' about this!?"

Said redhead didn't even look up from her spot. "I'm in the middle of eating precious cake right now Gajeel, why don't you take care of it?"

"YOU AND YOUR FREAKIN' CAKE." He yelled before stomping over to the two, mumbling to himself. "Fine, she wants me ta do somethin'? then I'll do somethin'..."

Lily took this chance to fly off of the Iron Dragon Slayer's shoulder and sit on a piece of what use to be a table to watch. If only he had a recording Lacrima…

Gajeel stood in between the two and put his hands up, stopping Juvia and Gray in their tracks. Their eyes widened. " **Gajeel**!" They both said in surprise. Gray sighed in relief. "Gajeel! You gotta help me! Something is wrong with Juvia!"

Gajeel turned to her and finally got a good look at her. His eye twitched and his face turned dark at the mere sight of what seemed to be a picture of the past. She even said that 'drip, drip, drop' stuff like she use to. And he also recalled that it had been raining...There was only one thing he could say in this situation…

"Holy Crap she's back..."

Another minute went by before Gajeel turned to her completely in irritation. "Dang it Rain Woman! I knew if you went to that freakin' potion shop somethin' like this would happen! This is why you should listen to me!"

Gray blinked. "Potion shop..?"

The Dragon Slayer suddenly turned around to turn his irritation on Gray. "You!" The Ice Mage blinked in surprise as he continued. "You're the one that freakin' drove her to this!"

The Ice Make Mage's eye started to twitch, growing irritated himself. "I didn't do anything!"

Gajeel took a step closer. "That's the problem Stripper! Can't ya just tell 'er yes or no already!?"

Gray also took a step closer in anger. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

Gajeel's forehead was now pushing against Gray's, veins showing up. "Oh really!?"

Gray pushed right back. "Really!"

The two were so busy arguing that they didn't notice the topic of their argument fall to her knees. Her vision started to blur and her eyes were gaining that all too familiar heaviness. Lily, who was laughing at Gajeel for being such a brother, seemed to notice and stopped chuckling. "Juvia!"

The two stopped and as soon as they looked over, saw her pass out and fall completely to the floor. Both called her name and ran over. Lily flew over to try and calm down Gajeel, who was freaking out and trying to wake the poor girl up by shaking her violently.

Gray was beside him and called out to her. "Come on Juvia! Wake up!" However, the only response they got was Juvia's body turning into water, literally slipping through their fingers.

" **AHHH!** " they both cried, freaking out more, if possible.

"Stupid Iron Breathe! How could you shake her like that!? Now look at what you did!"

"Me!? If you could just state your freakin' feelings, none of this would've happened!"

As the two went at it again, Lily watched as the water gathered behind them to reform into Juvia, who seemed to be waking up, sitting up with her hand in her forehead. "Wha...What happened to Juvia..?"

Lily turned to her and smiled, relieved that she was back to normal. "It seems that whatever changed you has left your system. Which is good because you had those two worried sick."

She looked over at them and rubbed her eyes, feeling like she had slept for hours. She was just extremely tired. Her eyes found their forms and realized that was where all of the yelling was coming from. "Gajeel-kun? Gray-sama? Why...are you yelling?"

The two stopped in mid sentence at the voice. Quickly, they turned to her and was glad to find her back to normal, sighing in relief and falling to the floor simultaneously. " **Thank Mavis!** " She yelped in response and started freaking out. "W-What's wrong!? Gajeel-kun? Gray-sama!?" She then noticed the room around her. "W-W-What happened to the guild!?" Her confusion was making her even more dizzy.

Lily only sighed, glad that everything was back to normal.

"WHAT DID YOU BRATS DO TO MY GUILD HALL!?"

Well...Almost everything.

THE END

 **A/N: LOL That was too much fun guys. I Love torturing Gray too much. xD And I was again showing my favorite Brotp: Gajeel and Juvia. XD Which, if you have read any of my other stories, you knew that already. lol**

 **This chapter was a little longer than I would have liked but you guys deserve a nice long one since it took longer than usual to update. :D FORGIVE ME T~T**

 **IMPORTANT notes include that I get reviews asking about future chapters and I just wanted to note that I DO NOT TAKE REQUESTS. All of the chapters are already listed in my notebook to write. you can still make suggestions if you want, but I think that I have the right to say no. Also, I cannot reply to guest reviewers so please do not ask me questions if you're reviewing as a guest.**

 **Other than that I hope you enjoyed this newest chapter! :D Thanks for all of your support!~ 3 and for reading my rambles...OTL**


	8. Favorite Pokemon?

Favorite Pokemon and Why?

Natsu: "Charizard! He looks like Igneel!"

Gray: "Weavile. It's cool."

Lucy: "Klefki! it's cute and has keys like I do!"

Erza: "Aegislash. It is a swift sword that changes form, just like my magic."

Mirajane: "Ditto! It's super cute and also changes its form, just like me!"

Elfman: "Pangoro! It's MANLY!"

Lisanna: "Skitty! It's so cute and lovable!"

Jet: "Manectric, it's almost as fast as I am."

Droy: "Venusaur! I really like how cool it looks when it uses grass-type moves."

Levy: "Unknown! I can spell with them!"

Gajeel: "Aggron, it can kick butt. Geehee!"

Juvia: "Luvdisc! If it were in the real world, Juvia would be able to give it to Gray-sama and we could get married and have 33 children!" Gray had no words or response.

Lily: "Lucario. He seems to be a brave warrior."

Happy: "Magicarp! It's a Magic Fish!" The others shook their heads.

Carla: "Espion. A strong, independent, classic, pokemon."

Wendy: "Altaria! She reminds me of Grandina with being a flying and dragon type."

Cana: "Spinda. It looks like it could take a few shots."

Gildarts: "Kangaskhan. The parenting relationship touches me."

Laxus: "Electrobuzz. Why? Because."

Evergreen: "Gardevoir. She's like the Queen of Fairies."

Freed: "Gallade. It would be strong enough to protect Laxus."

Bickslow: "Bisharp, because our armor would match, heh."

Lyon: "Milotic! Such a beautiful water creature reminds me so much of my Juvia!"

Meredy: "Girafarig. I like how unique it is and I also like giraffes."

Jellal: "Absol. We seem to have a lot in common when it comes to fighting our dark sides."

THE END

 **A/N: idk. This is what happens when I'm bored.**


	9. Laxus' Vacation

"Laxus! I've found the perfect mission for us!"

"No that's not the perfect mission, Freed! The only perfect mission is the one that I've picked of course!"

"Then why not run along and go on it with your boyfriend, Ever?"

"Boyfriend! Boyfriend!"

"S-Shut up Bixlow and pals! And wipe that smirk off of your face before I do it for you!"

"What smirk? This is my natural look! Plus this mission is way better for us."

"There is no way it could be!"

"Stop it, Ever, Bixlow! You're upsetting Laxus with your arguing!"

Said man was sitting at the bar in front of the three as they continued to banter behind him. His eye had started to twitch long ago, but he just started to rub his hand on his temple to try and make it it stop. Only to find that it wasn't helping. Yes, he cared for his friends dearly, and he's always been use to their normal arguing, but sometimes they could get out of hand. They were driving him mad and when he looked up for some kind of help, he was only greeted with Mira's sweetly cunning smile. The only help he was going to get from her was to set the three up on dates. And he will have no part in that.

"What's the matter Laxus?" Mira asked as she noticed his gaze.

He sighed. "I'm just tired…"

"Then why not take a break? Like a vacation."

He looked up at her with a blank stare for at least two minutes before he was able to even respond. "A what?"

She continued to smile knowing. "A vacation silly. Where you go somewhere you want to get away and relax."

His gaze, still blank, fell slowly downwards towards the countertop. "To get away...and relax, huh?"

She nodded as she wiped the dish in her hands. "If you'd like, I have an extra Hot Springs ticket that you could use."

He raised a brow. "The Hot Springs?"

She nodded again happily. "Yes! The warm water always helps your nerves calm down and it doesn't cost that much either. They also put herbs in the water to help restore magical energy. It's very relaxing. Would you like the ticket?"

He eyed her as she smiled at him. He did need a break, and Mira was making this sound very convincing… After a moment, he nodded. "That may not be a bad idea for once, Mira."

She reached for the ticket and handed it to him. "Oh Laxus, all of my ideas are great."

As he took the small piece of paper, he continued to stare at her with a blank expression for another whole minute before sighing again. She was being serious, wasn't she? _Oh well_ , he thought. _At least I'll finally get some time to myself._

As soon as he stood up and turned around however, he was met with the three moran's shouting and sticking request papers in his face. " **What mission do** _ **you**_ **want to go on Laxus**!?"

And the twitching continues… But he kept a straight face as they waited for his answer, not expecting what he was about to say next. "Go on whichever one you want, I'm going on vacation." And with that, he walked right past them, leaving their shocked forms behind him.

Mira walked up to the trio and poked Freed's cheek. "Oh my, they're frozen from shock."

Elfman came up from behind her and blinked. "Oh no! They're all turned to stone!"

"Not really Elf-neesan, they're frozen." Lisanna tried but he was already ignoring her.

Max leaned over towards Warren, sitting next to him. "Wait for it…"

"Being frozen is Manly!"

Max laughed. "There it is!"

Warren laughed with Max. "Didn't need to read his mind to know that was coming!"

Lisanna facepalmed. "Elf-neesan…"

Suddenly, the three turned around quickly towards the doors with horror and sadness on their faces and their hands outstretched. " **No wait for us Laxus!** " Then Freed fell to the floor in anguish, Evergreen looked upset, and Bixlow looked really disappointed.

Mira tried to comfort them with Elfman as Max stopped laughing to look towards the doorway. "He's long gone, isn't he?."

Lisanna and Warren nodded. " **Yup**."

~*+-At The Hot Springs-+*~

Laxus glanced up from the ticket in his hand to the large fancy gates of the Hot Springs Resort. It was strange really, the building seemed to be...glowing. In a weird sparkling kind of way. This however, didn't drive off the Dragon Slayer. He had walked quite a bit to get there and the glowing part he had decided just to blame on exhaustion. When was the last time he had a break?

He walked in through the front door and was greeted by the young man behind the counter, noticing that it was just as bright inside as it was outside. The decor was quite the sight too, red and expensive looking. Not that he got a chance to admire it as he suddenly heard a high-pitched squealing and looked over to be met with a random mob of one of the worse things in history to ever plague the land of Fiore…

Fangirls.

"It's Laxus-kun from Fairy Tail! OMG!"

He blinked at the name. "Laxus- _kun_?"

"Let's get him!"

"Ah crap-" They all were screaming as they started to chase him out of the lobby. The young man behind the counter gave a cheery farewell instead of trying to help. Thanks buddy. Laxus glanced over his shoulder and couldn't believe it. How were fangirls so fast? He had the speed of lightning and they were right on his tail. Usually he didn't have to deal with this because the Thunder Legion kept them at bay. Now he understood a little of how Gray feels. Poor guy. He was also pretty sure Juvia was as bad as a mob, or worse in her own weird way.

It took some time, but he was able to lose them, though now he was sweating and panting like he had just ran a marathon. His nerves were really in need of some relaxation now… So with that thought in mind he slowly, and carefully went back into the lobby and up to the front deck.

The same useless young man was there with that goofy smile on his face, infact, it reminded him of Mira. No wonder he didn't help him. He was most likely enjoying Laxus' suffering. "Why hello Laxu-" Laxus quickly reached over the counter to cover his mouth, looking around the empty lobby suspiciously before sighing and glaring into the poor young man's eyes. "Speak that name, and die."

He quickly nodded, scared for his life and Laxus let go, now with his usual bored look. The young guy stuttered. "W-W-What can I d-do for you, Sir?" Laxus sighed in relief before handing him his ticket. The man seemed to also be relieved that Laxus is back to being non-murderous and nodded after seeing the ticket. "So you're here for the Hot Springs?"

Laxus just stared at him like he was stupid. "What else would I be here for..?"

Suddenly the young man's face became bright. "Well let me show you!" Laxus inwardly started to panic. "N-No you really don't have to-"

"Nonsense! It's part of my job to give you the grand tour! Let's go!~" He grabbed onto the Lightning Mage, who's face said the exact opposite of the worker's, and started to drag him around the Hot Spring's building. Unfortunately for Laxus, the building had over twenty levels, and the poor Dragon Slayer hadn't the energy to retaliate after running away from the Fangirl Mob. He had used what was left to threaten the same guy that was now pushing him around and that was only because he had adrenalin left. Now that was ran dry just like his magic.

He just gave up on trying to escape.

An hour and a half later: Laxus was about ready to kill something. Namely the unfortunate young man who had to work that day. Finally though, he seemed to be done as they both somehow managed to make it back to the lobby alive. "And here we are, back at the beginning! Now was there anything in particular you want to do now that you've seen it all?"

Laxus grid his teeth together. "I Just. Want. To go. To. The Hot Springs. So I Can. Relax."

The man blinked nervously and nodded slowly. "Well your ticket covers that so you can go ahead and go..." Without a word Laxus goes straight past him and back towards the springs, looking forward to just being able to relax. He opened the door to the changing room and noticed that someone was already in the bath. He thought that the color of the clothes looked familiar, but he quickly put that thought aside. So there was someone else in there. Whatever, it was a pretty big bath house.

He tied his towel and grabbed his soap before opening the door. He was about to step in but the sight before him made Laxus stop in terror. The man already in the bath looked over at him. Everything stopped, only the water and Laxus' twitching eye were the only things left moving. All Laxus wanted to do in that moment was run away. Far, far away.

The man raised his hand and winked. "Meeeeeeeeeen!~"

Silence.

Some random sparkles clouded Ichiya's still winking face. "Good Evening Laxus~"

Laxus slammed the door as hard and as fast as he could with what little strength he had left before gathering his things and changing as fast he could, running out of the Resort like it was an overwhelming enemy.

~*+-At The Guild-+*~

Mira looked worryingly at the three sitting at a table in the corner of the room. "I hope Laxus comes home soon...I've tried everything to cheer them up but nothing's worked."

Lisanna glanced over at the three and sighed, sipping her drink. "I donno...They're pretty out of it." Bixlow was boredly poking at one of his babies, which were lying on the table lifeless. Evergreen was sighing sadly while leaning on her hand every two minutes. And Freed's head was lightly hitting against the table in between his comrades, who didn't seem to mind. All three were still holding the requests in their hands.

Cana, sitting next to Lisanna, glanced over at them with a raised brow. "Wow, I don't think I've ever seen them so depressed before."

Lianna nodded. "Then again, I don't think I've ever heard of Laxus going on vacation before either." The other two nodded and they all sighed, not knowing what to do for them.

Then suddenly, the doors burst open. Revealing Laxus in all of his tired, panting glory. The guild members watched with wide eyes as he stomped over to the Raijinshuu, who didn't seem to notice him until he was towering over them. They looked up at him is shock. " **L-Laxus!** "

His expression was stern and it made them all stand up in order, ready to obey his words. "Let's go." He turned to leave and they all blinked, but followed. Bixlow's babies suddenly coming to life. "W-Where to?" The youngest of them asked.

Laxus looked over his shoulder at them with a smirk on his face as they left the guild. "I've been thinkin' that taking vacations aren't my style, so we're going to work."

The three glanced at each other curiously, then back at him. Freed decided to ask what they were all thinking. "So you picked a job for us, Laxus?"

He laughed, which made them jump a bit from surprise. "What are ya talking about? You all picked those out earlier didn't cha? I need to calm my nerves a bit, so let's take em all out!"

They all smiled and raised their hands that were holding onto the papers. " **Yeah!** "

Laxus couldn't help but smile. Who needs a vacation when you can relax through the likeness of working with your friends?

THE END

 **Haaaaa, so I haven't updated in awhile...OTL sorry bout that...but here is a chapter for you!**

 **And it's about Laxus~ Who doesn't love Laxus? XD At any rate, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Updates will be a bit slow I'm sorry, but the story shall continue!**

 **Because it's Fairy Tail, and there are a lot of crack moments. ;)**

 **Two chapters in a row for you guys since I kept you waiting! 3**


	10. Reactions To Fanfiction

Fanfiction Reactions

Natsu: Raised a brow. "Why is it that whenever I put my name, the word 'Nalu' shows up?"

Gray: To shocked to even comprehend anything as he had just found out what 'Gralu' and 'Gruvia' meant.

Lucy: "WHY DO I KEEP LEAVING THE GUILD!?"

Erza: "T-They understand me so well!" Starts tearing up from the joy of having understanding fans.

Mira: "ALL OF MY SHIPS ARE HERE!" Then she starts squealing and ends up reading every single pearing possible.

Elfman: "Reading fanfiction is MANLY!"

Lisanna: Reads about everyone but herself.

Jet: "THERE'S ONLY ONE FANFIC OF SHADOW GEAR WITHOUT GAJEEL!?"

Droy: Starts crying.

Levy: Becomes curious and ends up reading everything that's Nalu.

Gajeel: Ends up reading stories about his cat.

Juvia: "WE HAVE A SHIP NAME!" Starts writing Gruvia stories while reading them at the same time, proving that her imagination is indeed very scary.

Lily: Becomes curious and at the sight his jaw drops. "GAJEEL GET'S OVER 1,000 FICS AND I ONLY HAVE 11!?"

Happy: Reads all 43 fanfics of him and Carla together.

Carla: Reads about Wendy, then asks her questions to confirm whether something was right in the story or not.

Wendy: Doesn't understand much but is happy that people seem to like her.

Cana: Glad that people understand her love of alcohol.

Gildarts: Reads every story about him and Cana and then after running out, reading all of Cana's stories only to try and beat every guy that was in said stories, scaring half of her guildmates to death.

Laxus: Doesn't care but reads the ones that are suggested to him by the three morons.

Evergreen: Secretly reads about Elfman.

Freed: Writes detailed angry reviews to anyone that puts Laxus out of character.

Bickslow: The one to read all of the Crack Fics.

Lyon: Of course he would read every Lyvia fic available and try to learn from them so he could win Juvia's heart.

Meredy: The one to read endless crossovers.

Jellal: Faints at seeing the word 'Jerza' and would never recover.

 **A/N: LOLOLOL This was so much fun guys. I can't even. XD**


	11. Levy's List

**A/N: Hey everyone! I know it's been a while and I'm sorry...haven't been able to write recently because of life and stuff so my apology is this story, we cool..? TvT;)/**

 **I don't own Fairy Tail!**

When people think of the mage Levy Mcgarden, they obviously think of the small, adorable, bandana lover, Fairy Tail's Solid Script Mage. Always happy, positive, and overall lovely to anyone she meets. However, those who know her best have realized something _very_ important about the small mage…

Never, like EVER, get onto The List.

As we all know, Levy has quite the liking towards words. So it is just common knowledge that she likes to read and write constantly. So it's not all that hard to believe that she likes to jot things down time to time when idea's come to mind, or that she may have a list or two of things that she wants to do or may need in the future.

But The List is no ordinary list.

As we are about to explain in this crack story where Gajeel, of course, finds out the hard way that being on Levy's bad side is much scarier than one thousand dragons all attacking him at once.

And poor Pantherlily is in the middle of it all.

The exceed's face scrunched up in worry as he glanced from the short blunette across the table reading a book to his sappy fool of a best friend next to him sweating like an idiot and stealing glances at her nervously. Neither one had said a word since she came over and sat down at the same table an hour ago. Yet Gajeel, too stubborn for his own good, didn't make a move to leave first.

So now both sat in silence as Lily refused to slam his head into the table. The awkwardness was suffocating him. All because _somebody_ had to go and, as always, do something stupid and now the almost-never-mad Levy was, well, _mad_ at the Iron Dragon Slayer.

He glanced at her as she read. Lily was almost certain that she wasn't just ignoring Gajeel, but rather, making sure that she made him nervous by being close by. That would explain why she came and sat at the same table even though she was clearly still angry with him.

It was working too. Gajeel was still sweating and acting like a stubborn, guilty, child who knew that he did something wrong but was too tough to admit it and apologize. Now for the second day in a row, he was faced with Levy's silent wrath.

Yes, silent. Like the calm before the storm. Almost as fierce as Erza's glare, but Levy didn't even need to glare at him for him to feel like she already was. Her presence was so dark that it prevented even Gajeel from being able to speak.

Lily sighed and ran a hand down his face. Even if Gajeel had the guts to apologize, he wouldn't be able to with this sour atmosphere. It even caused the rest of the guild to be quiet, which also worried Pantherlily. He glanced around the room to confirm so, but yes, everyone was being as quiet as possible, as if speaking would set off some kind of bomb that would destroy them all.

It was ironic really. The women who loved books, words, and overall conversation, was able to make the entire guild, including himself, fear to speak a single word with just her presence and fowl mood.

The cat suddenly turned to Gajeel and gave him a face that indicated to do something fast. Gajeel on the other hand, clearly thought he was absurd and gave him an expression that stated he would do no such thing.

Huffing in irritation, Lily left the table with his wings and landed on a table on the other end of the guild with Team Natsu, who had just returned from a job not too long ago and were just talking about what could possibly be going on.

Lucy noticed Lily's arrival and decided to ask him in a whisper. "Lily! Do you know what happened to Levy-chan?!"

Before he could answer Erza, yes _Erza_ , even looked at him nervously. "C-Could someone have possibly...gotten on Levy's bad side..?"

Natsu and Gray both gasped and hugged each other in fear, as if Erza was about to spot them bickering. Happy, next to Lily, was so shocked that his fish that he was enjoying fell out of his mouth and was forgotten.

Pantherlily, quite confused by their antics, raised a scared brow. "Could it be...that this has happened before..?"

Lucy, looking as confused as the exceed, also looked between them all. " _Has_ this happened before?"

Gray gulped. "Someone people _have_ pushed Levy over the edge…"

Natsu nodded shakingly. "Aye...They were put on...The List."

Gray quickly covered Natsu's mouth and whisper-yelled at him. "Don't mention it out loud you idiot! We were once on that stupid list, remember!"

"Don't tell me what ta do!"

"Oh, yeah!? Bring it!"

Erza got up to try and stop them but a sudden chill in the air made everyone freeze in place, slowly turning their sweating heads towards the solid script mage, who wasn't even looking at them, yet they knew that she was throwing mental daggers at them, daring them to continue yelling.

They all quickly sat back down with their hands in their laps in shame. The air's chill went away, leaving the now normal angry awkwardness from before.

Lucy started trembling. "Whoa…I'm totally scared guys. Of my best friend..!"

Natsu nodded. "Aye..! Even though she's not actually mad at _us.._!"

The _Ice_ Mage shivered. "I'd hate ta be that guy right now…"

Pantherlily was still very confused. "I still don't understand...Can someone explain please?"

Erza turned to him with nervous eyes. The small warrior, who respected the redhead very much for her strength, was starting to wonder if his best friend's life needed to be worried about with the way the three were acting. _He_ was even freaking out slightly. "Y-You see...Levy is usually the most positive out of everyone in our guild, however…"

She gulped and Gray continued for her. "When she snaps, she _snaps_."

Erza cleared her throat to continue. "There have only been a few instances...However, for example, when someone like Natsu goes sneaking into Fairy hills and accidentally burns down Levy's personal library…"

Lily winced at the thought. "She...snapped?"

Natsu shook at the memories from when he was a child. "Dude she didn't speak a freakin word ta me for two weeks and ignored me. She left me notes in a different language and I thought they were curses. Just by lookin' at her I knew she was _REALLY_ mad at me and I just kept waitin' for something terrible ta happen ta me. But nothin' ever came! It was so freakin' scary after two weeks I cried for her ta forgive me…"

Lucy and Lily winced at the image as Gray went on. "So whenever someone pushed Levy over the edge...We started callin' it 'The List'. If you were put on that list, well…" He gulped.

Erza finished. "Whatever you had done, she would make sure you felt guilty about it."

Pantherlily, now understanding, nodded slowly. "I see…"

Lucy looked at them nervously. "S-So then...Who was it this time..?"

Lily sighed and rubbed his temple. "It was Gajeel…"

They all blinked at him in surprise, even talking in unision. " **But she…** "

He nodded. "Yes, still no mistake that she.." He glanced at her before back at them, as if making sure she couldn't hear them. "Has feelings for the big dult."

Now they looked confused. " **Then how did he…** "

He raised a brow at his comrades with slight amusement. "Get her mad at him?" They nodded and his amusement shifted to announce and irritation. "Hah...The fool ran his mouth like always and said something he shouldn't have."

Lucy grimaced. "Oh no...What did he say..?"

He sighed, starting from the beginning. "It all started yesterday morning when Gajeel was invited by Levy on a mission, just the two of them…"

" _Geehee. Shrimp, are ya sure ya can handle a mission like this?"_

 _She puffed out her cheeks in annoyance. "That's why I wanted to know if you wanted to..um..come with me…"_

 _He smirked and patted her head as if she were his pet. "Geehee! Of course I'll go with ya Shrimp!" She smiled up at him, but it was soon wiped off of her face with his next sentence, and her anger only grew with each passing word that followed it. "Otherwise ya wouldn't ever get this kind of job done. Really, this is a stop-the-bandits request. Yer tiny body ain't able ta handle this kinda stuff. Maybe if ya stopped readin' books you would be able ta focus on more important things like training. But don't worry Shrimp, I'll go with'cha."_

Lily sighed. "In just one conversation, Gajeel was able to make fun of her height, her inability to fight, and her love of reading. Honestly, I know he wasn't thinking, but what he said was just plain insulting and Levy...didn't take it very well." They nodded, but he went on, looking over at the awkward pair with worry. "However, he's so terrified he can't speak, afraid to upset her even more. I'm hoping this will end soon because I don't think I can handle going home again with Gajeel beating his head into the wall. It makes it incredibly hard to sleep…"

They glanced over at the two with him and Erza nodded. "All I can say is that she just wants him to apologize."

The exceed looked to her. "That may be difficult, he isn't the kind of man to admit he is wrong.."

She smiled and gestured towards Natsu and Gray, who were for some reason or another glaring at each other, but were easily ignored. "Neither are they. With the way Levy handles the people she's angry with, I'm sure he's ready to by now."

Happy, finally waking up from his shock as if nothing had happened, nodded. "Aye!"

He shared her smile and nodded, spreading his wings. "I hope you're right." And with that, he left his friends to go have a discussion with his Iron dragon Idiot. And by discussion, he really meant speeding at Gajeel, grabbing his hair, causing him to make a strange sound, and forcing him to go outside with him.

"What was that for!?" The dragon slayer cried out when the doors shut, patting down his black mane.

Lily took this opportunity to kick him in the face, keeping flight as Gajeel fell to the ground in surprise. "Fool! Why haven't you said anything yet!?"

"You didn't answer my question, why should I answer yers!?"

Trying to dodge the subject? That wouldn't work on Lily. "I kicked you because you deserved it! You knew better than to get cocky and say such things, to her face even! Have you no shame!?" Lily hadn't confronted Gajeel about the situation yet in hopes that he would handle it himself like a man, however, he was being as slow as a snail, leaving Lily to have to push him a bit.

The Iron Dragon Slayer's lip started to pout and Lily sighed as he flew down and landed on his shoulder. "Get up."

Gajeel glanced away. "I don wonna…"

"Gajeel, do you want to fix this, or have her mad at you forever?"

His pout grew as he stood and made his way to the door, stopping in front of the doorknob. "W-what should I say, Lil?"

Pantherlily sighed, but patted his head in comfort, knowing that his friend was about to go into the biggest battle of his life. "Say that you're sorry Gajeel." He glanced down at him expectantly. "You are...sorry, correct?"

Gajeel gulped. "More than I've been in my entire life…"

Lily nodded. "Good. Then you'll know what to say."

Gajeel opened the door and winced as he looked over at the girl, who still ignored him as he walked up to her. "H-hey, Shrimp..?" When the air chilled again, he freaked a little, Lily taking this as a sign to land on the table in between them. "I-I-I mean...L-Levy…"

For the first time since she became mad at him, she looked up at him, expectantly, but still looked. Now that he held her attention, he wasn't quite sure what to do with it, other than speak his mind, even though that's what got him into this mess to begin with. "L-Look, I know I'm bad with words, you know that more than anyone...S-So ya also know that I don't think before I speak, kay? I wasn't thinkin' when I said all that crap and really, I didn't mean any of it. I mean, if ya want ta get stronger, I'm sure ya could, I'd even train ya."

She raised a brow as he spouted nonsense, almost looking amused. He cleared his throat. "Anyways...I, um, look I'm sorry, alright? I'm sorry I said what I did and I won't ever do it again, I swear. A-And if ya still wanted ta go on that job, I'm free."

After a moment of staring at him, the atmosphere changed into a lighter one and she smiled up at him, setting her book down on the table as she stood. "I'd like that Gajeel. I'd like that very much."

Lily smiled as the rest of the guild looked very much relived. And so everything went back to normal as the two ended up taking the request and leaving that evening. Pantherlily smiled as he drank his kiwi juice. All was well with the world at last.

The Master came over to sit next to him on the bar. "Not going with them?"

Lily smiled with amusement. "And risk getting put on The List by interrupting Levy's confession? Not this furball."

Makarov laughed as he took a drink of his beer. "It _is_ a terrible place to be…"

He raised a brow at his Master. "Have you possibly been on it?" The air around the older man changed into a dark one as he sighed with his head down and Lily nodded slowly. "I see…"

Lily made a large mental note that day.

Do not, EVER, get on Levy's List.


	12. Jellal's Nightmare

Jellal walked down the streets of Magnolia, or rather, because the man was a wanted criminal, he was going through the shadows of said streets. Like the wind, he was swift to pass people by on his way to the number one guild in Fiore.

He needed to talk to their master about a lead he had on a criminal he was after. As much as Meredy wanted to come with him to see Juvia and beat up Fullbuster, he told her to stay behind and rest. She had been wounded in the last battle they had been in and he didn't want her condition to become worse.

He sighed at the thought of her puppy-dog-eyes. He swore they would be the end of him one of these days. He honestly doesn't know how he managed to make her stay home. Okay, so he may or may not be turning into the big brother that gives his younger sister anything she asked for, but part of him was okay with that. The other part was just his pride telling him he was turning into a wuss, which he gladly ignored.

His thoughts came to a complete stop however when the guild hall came into full view. He stopped in his tracks at the strange sight before him, still standing in the alleyway entrance. Guild members running around carrying what looked like decorations for a huge social event of some kind. He blinked at the sight, noticing then that much that was being carried was cake. A _lot_ of cake. But not just any cake. _Her_ favorite cake.

He gasped as many different scenarios came to mind. Was it her birthday? When _was_ her birthday? How on earth does he not know her birthday!? He doesn't even have a gift for her! What kind of man was he!?

Somehow, during his inner panic, he ended up on all fours in the middle of the street with a gloomy atmosphere, unknowingly getting in the way of two teenagers and a flying cat walking towards him.

"Wow Luce, you're stronger than ya look!"

"Aye! Who would've known with those skinny arms of her's!"

"You know, instead of criticizing me, you could help me out here-ahh!" Lucy didn't get to finish yelling about her frustration as she tripped on Jellal's arm, the heavy strawberry cake she was carrying being thrown behind her and landing on Natsu's face.

After skiing on her face, the blonde sat up to find that Natsu was covered in cake with a confused expression and Happy was laughing his head off. Ignoring them, she looked over to find what she had tripped on and screamed. "AHHH, DEAD BODY!"

After licking all of the cake off of his face clean like it wasn't covered in cake a minute ago, Natsu went over and leaned down to poke the said 'dead body', receiving a strange hopeless sound from it which made Lucy shreek. "Nah, it's just Jellal, Luce. But jeez, I thought he'd never show up."

She looked down at the man that went from being on all fours to just lying there lifeless and blinked. "Jellal? Oh. B-but he's not looking so good..." Then realization came to her face and she started to sweat, looking over at Natsu. "W-Wait, shouldn't we tell erza..?"

The Fire Dragon Slayer froze at the thought, Happy even stopped laughing and shared the look. He suddenly took Jellal by the shoulders and shook him violently. "Yo man you gotta wake up!"

"Natsu! What are you doing!? Shouldn't we go get help-"

He cut her off, turning to look at her like she was nuts. "We can't! If we tell Erza that Jellal's not doin' well, who knows what she'll do to us. We can't just show up at her wedding with him like this! We'll get blamed! Isn't he the guest of honor or somethin' like that!?"

Lucy was about to correct him but at Natsu's words, Jellal sprang to life and grabbed the younger man's shoulders, his face still dark. "What...did you say..?"

Nervous under Jellal's gaze, Natsu blinked. "Uh...Guest of Honor..?"

Jellal got a bit closer, his grip tightening slightly. "Too..?"

Natsu blinked again. "Too...Erza's wedding..?"

"Erza's…." It took a minute for the words to process and then another minute to decipher their meaning. Then just as fast as he had grabbed Natsu, he lost his grip and fell over, feeling as if his soul was leaving his body.

Lucy, Natsu, and even Happy yelled in horror. "AHHHHHHHHH!"

"HOW COULD YOU NATSU! YOU KILLED HIM!"

"I DIDN'T FREAKIN' MEAN TO!"

"WHAT ARE WE GOING TO TELL ERZA!?"

At Happy's words, the other two looked up at him and after a few long seconds of silence, they huddled together to discuss the matter on how to wake him up.

Meaningless to say, Jellal woke up to cake being stuffed down his throat. After sitting up and choking, he looked over to find Natsu and his cat laughing at him as Lucy looked sympathetic. Blinking at them, he rubbed his face. "W-Where am I..? And why do I taste Strawberry Ca-" Then he remembered their previous conversation and quickly looked at Natsu. "What do you mean by wedding!?"

Natsu waved him off like it was a trivial matter and instead grabbed one of his arms. He blinked. "Huh..?" Lucy grabbed his other arm so he turned to her with the same clueless expression. "Huh?" Then Happy started pushing him from behind as they all had unreadable smiles and started running towards the guild hall's double doors. "HUH?!"

Slamming through the double doors, everyone looked over at them and smiled brightly at seeing them, crowding around them all.

"Oh good! Jellal is here!"

"Erza will be so happy to see you!"

"So glad you could make it!"

No matter how many people he looked at in the face, Jellal couldn't understand anything that was happening. He went to ask Natsu or Lucy but found with shock that both had fled the seen and left him to the wolves.

"Jellal?"

His eyes widened at the voice, and as the crowd parted, he saw her standing there in a wedding gown, her scarlet hair in an updo, veil and train trailing behind her in white lace. Suddenly the room got really hot, or maybe it was just him? Either way, he couldn't manage to speak a single word, leaving his mouth to open and close dumbly like a fish out of water.

She smiled brightly at the sight of him and rushed over, grabbing his hands. "Oh how wonderful for you to come! I was worried you wouldn't make it! You are part of the Wedding Party afterall."

His face exploded. "A-A-A part of t-the W-Wedding Party..?" Was he dreaming? Was this finally happening? If it is a dream, he would like to live it out to the very end.

"Oh! You haven't had the chance to meet the Groom yet, have you? Come, I shall introduce him to you." Suddenly, his world broke, even though she was holding his hand and smiling brightly, her words made him almost freeze in place. He takes it back. Instead of 'living it out', he has decided that he should just die now.

"Honey! You must meet my closest friend! His name is Jellal." The wizard being dragged around froze on the spot, his jaw hitting the floor at not only being fiercely friend-zoned, but also at seeing the husband-to-be. The man before him looks normal starting from his black shoes all the way up his tuxedo to his neck. However, the normality stops there.

His head had no face, no mouth, no eyes. It was only a giant slice of _strawberry cake._

The Cake-man held out his normal looking hand out for Jellal to take. "How nice to finally meet you, Jellal. I'm Strawberry Cake."

Jellal flinched at the deep, dark voice that seemed to come from the slice, his thoughts going awry. _"IT SPOKE!"_ Wordlessly, and with his mouth still trying to catch flies, he shook his hand. Why? he wasn't sure but he guessed it was to confirm that it was real. It sure did feel like it was…

Despite himself, he looked over at Erza, who had shifted to link her arm in her Groom's and spoke hoarsely. "E-Erza..H-how did you two m-meet again..?"

She laughed and waved her hand and giggled, not seeming to notice that his knees where on the verge of giving out, despite the fact that she was an S-class wizard. "We met in a Cake shop! It seems that we both love eating strawberry cake! isn't that right dear?" the Cake nodded and Jellal's shock only grew. _"A CANABLE!?"_

The slice turned to Erza and spoke again, still making Jellal flinch at the unexpected deep voice. "Dear, we should hurry or we'll be late for our own wedding."

Erza laughed at the joke even though the voice didn't sound the least bit funny. "Yes, you are right." She looked to Jellal. "Please hurry and get dressed, or you'll be late as well."

He thought it over and quickly decided to run far away as fast as possible. "O-oh no! I-I could only come for this long..! I must be on my way soon and-"

She waved her hand. "Oh nonsense. Girls?" He suddenly saw more and more females in fancy gowns surround him with a tux, accessories and huge smirks. When he gave Erza a pleading look, she didn't show any sign of mercy and only smiled. "Please take good care of him."

And so, our poor friend Jellal was dragged away and shoved into a locked dressing room with everything necessary to get ready for a wedding that he wanted to be far away from. Reluctantly, he finished and as soon as he knocked on the door to be let out, was grabbed and dragged over to behind the guild on the beach, where the wedding was apparently being held. He was forced to stand behind Erza where the 'Maid of Honor' would normally be. He had to keep his jaw from falling to the ground. not only was he rejected and friend-zoned, he was now placed as the Maid of Honor instead of Best Man!

He flinched as a thought came to him, and out of pure curiosity, glanced over to see who the Best Man _was_. Again, he had to keep from showing his shock and disgust, even though he should have seen it coming... Not only was the man of honor a smaller copy of the Groom, the other two men standing next to him in the line where also Cakemen. The only difference other than height was the fact that they were other kinds of cake instead of just Strawberry.

He started to sweat and before he knew it, Makarov, who was doing the vows, had somehow already gotten to the end. "You may now kiss the bride!"

This time his jaw _did_ hit the ground. _"Wait! You didn't even ask if anyone objects!"_

But it was to late, Erza's lips had already been stolen by a man without any of his own and makarov declared them Husband and Wife. All he could do with rivers running down his face with fall on all fours and reach out yelling.

"NOOO! ERZA! DON'T MARRY THE STRAWBERRY CAKE!"

Silence.

After a few more minutes, his eyes focused and he realized that he was home, in his bed, in the little shack that he and Meredy found and claimed as their own after the Grand Magic Games ended. He blinked at his bedroom's ceiling.

Sitting up, he wiped off the sweat that was on his face and slowly made his way to the kitchen where he found Meredy cooking their breakfast. She didn't even look away from the stove as he leaned against the doorway. "So, in this one, Erza was marrying Strawberry Cake over you?"

"I don't wanna talk about it..."

She rolled her eyes, she smirked and tried not to laugh. He only grew more depressed as he sank in his chair at the table. She started hearing a light thud and looked over to find him hitting his head on the table, mumbling to himself on how he lost to cake.

Her eye twitched. "I don't care if you're depressed about something as ridiculous as losing Erza to _cake_ , but don't take it out on our table!"

He covered his face with his hands in shame. "B-But Meredy..!"

She sighed as she finished their meal, laying it out on the table as she spoke. "Alright, alright, I get it, It was a terrible dream that felt so real that you now believe she'll pick Strawberry cake over you." She sat down and gave him and smile. "I know how you could fix that though."

He gave her a serious expression. "You're right, tomorrow I'll start destroying every shop in Magnolia that carries Strawberry Cake and-Ow!"

As her irritation had risen from his stupidity, she reached over the small table and whacked him on the head. "No idiot!" She sighed and leaned back in her seat, ignoring that he was still complaining that she had hit him and gave him a smirk. "I meant that you could just ask her to marry you now!"

A few moments of silence passed as he stared at her blankly. Then he hit the ground, his face the color brighter than his crush's.

"Jellal? Jellal! Hey! Wake up! I was joking, I'm sorry! HEY! YOUR FOOD IS GOING TO GO TO WASTE!"

END

 **HAHAHA Yeah, I just had to, okay? After I saw a pick of Erza marrying a guy with cake for a head, I had to do an in depth chapter about Jellal! XD Hope you all enjoyed! I was trying to go for more comedy in this chapter so I hope I delivered!~ Until next time! ^v^)/**


	13. Lyon's Pickup Lines

Lyon smirked at himself as he proudly strode through the city of Magnolia, going towards the large and famous guild hall of none other than Fairy Tail itself. He had one mission and one mission only. To woo the most beautiful girl in the world, Juvia Lockser.

You see, though apart of Lamia Scale, Lyon has only eyes for her. Of course, you already knew this. Unless you live under a rock or have the attention span of Natsu.

Thus we come to the main point of this story. Lyon is going to win over Juvia by the end of this chapter. Even if he has to pull out every pickup line in Fiore to get to that point.

He only wishes to be noticed, admired, or at least accepted by the end of his stay. And with the doors of the rowdy place finally in view, he boldly opened them and went inside, instantly finding the girl he was looking for.

Their eyes met, and he swore they were shining. He smiled as he walked over to her, trying to be attractive by leaning over on the counter with one hand and using the other to brush through his hair. "Hey Juvia."

Juvia, not seeming to notice his change of behavior at all, smiled brightly at seeing her friend. "Well hello Lyon-sama! Juvia didn't know she would see you today."

He nodded, brushing his hair a second time. "Yes, I had an unexpected urge to come see you."

She blinked. "Oh? Why is that? Does Lyon-sama need something from Juvia?"

Lyon's heart raced as he felt the line coming on. Her heart, that was all he ever wanted. However, when he went to respond, a chorus of giggling came from behind the bar and his face turned pale. He should have been expecting someone to be eavesdropping…

After a moment, he regained himself, but now the previous atmosphere was lost. So after meeting her curious, deep, blue eyes again, he cleared his throat, going back to leaning on the counter. "So, Juvia, is the sun always this bright, or do your eyes just shine that much?" More giggling could be heard by the Ice Mage, however, he was able to ignore it and instead waited for his beloved's reply. He could just imagine it.

" _Oh Lyon-sama, how you make Juvia's heart flutter! Please, let her reward you with a kiss on the cheek~"_ He was practically drooling at the thought.

"But Lyon-sama, we're inside."

He had almost un-coolly slipped from leaning on the counter but was able to pick himself back up before anyone had noticed. Well, with the terribly muffled laughter coming from an unknown eavesdropper, obviously someone had. But Juvia as still oblivious, which seemed to be a good and a bad thing. "Y-Yes Juvia, you are right, I was just blinded by your refreshing beauty." That's right. He could redeem himself by being a bit more bold.

Or get her to laugh hysterically.

He blinked as he watched her laugh. Though he enjoied hearing it, he couldn't help but feel like she had missed the point.

"Juvia gets it! _Refreshing_ , because she is made of water! Hahaha! Juvia never knew Lyon-sama were so funny!"

His jaw dropped. She thought he was telling a _joke_!? That was not what he was going for! Okay, so he was happy that she thought he was funny, but it doesn't really feel all that great when he's not _trying_ to be funny... Not to mention that the ones hiding behind the bar were still laughing at his continuous failure. His eye twitched, but he soon smiled and laughed with her, not giving up. "Juvia, when did you become this cute?" She giggled and he hoped that he may have finally gotten through to her.

"Lyon-sama is very silly. Wendy-chan has always been cute!"

He blinked. "Huh..?"

She smiled, as if not getting why he was confused. "You asked has 'Wendy become this cute?', but she has always been cute!"

She continued to smile as he continued to fight the urge to slap himself in the forehead over and over again. She had misheard him! Of all the things…

He told himself before making his journey across Fiore to this very guild that he would not cry. Even if she doesn't take him seriously, or think he's joking, or mishear him! He was going to leave today a happy man! A handsome, manly, man that can take it all and still come out of it with his dream girl!

"THAT'S MANLY!"

Lyon's gaze sharply turned towards Elfman, who had just stood up from the table behind them to randomly yell out that phrase. The Ice Mage started to sweat from fear that maybe he had said all of that out loud…

Max, sitting at the same table as Elfman along with Warren, raised a brow. "What's that all about big guy?"

Elfman blinked before sitting back down with a perplexed look. "I donno, I just had the sudden urge ta say it, like someone had just told an awesome manly speech 'er somethin'..."

Just then, as if he couldn't take it any more, Warren bust out laughing. The other two didn't really know why he was laughing so hard, but then again, they weren't the ones to actually _hear_ the speech before Elfman's outburst.

Trying to figure out why the man was laughing so much, Lyon turned to Juvia. "Who...is that again..?"

She smiled at his curiousity. She was always happy to introduce her guildmates. "That's Warren-san, his magic can read thoughts and send them too. Though Warren-san isn't much of a fighter."

He started to sweat again, and slowly turned his head towards the man, who was still laughing his head off. Lyon's eye started to twitch. "So would he be able to hear me if I sent him a thought?"

Juvia thought a moment. "Juvia thinks so."

He nodded. "I see."

A moment later, Warren's laughter suddenly came to a halt as he gasped. He made eye contact with Lyon for only a second before slowly but swiftly making his way out of the guild. Max and Elfman waved him off, not seeming to notice how pale in the face he was.

Lyon was at a breaking point. Any self-esteem he had had at the beginning of this venture, was quickly depleting. He had to do something quick or he wasn't going to meet his goal today. However, when he went to open his mouth, _he_ showed up.

"Lyon? What are you doing here?" Asked no one other than Gray, who seemed surprised by his older brother-figure's presence.

"Gray-sama!" Juvia smiled brightly at him from her seat.

Gray, surprising to Lyon, gave Juvia a small smile. "Hey."

Lyon faked a smirk and a laugh as Gray sat unconsciously in between him and his beloved Juvia. On the inside Lyon was slamming his head into a mental wall over and over again. Weather he knew it or not, Gray had become a bit overprotective of the Water Mage. "I just wanted to come visit Juvia."

Gray rolled his eyes. "What, trying and failing with your pickup lines again?"

Lyon flinched, but puffed out his cheeks. "W-Well it's not like you could pull out a good pickup line!"

A vain grew on Gray's forehead. "I could do better than your sissy headlines!"

Lyon smirked, a new glint in his eyes, though there was also a vain on his forehead. "Oh? Prove it then! Try a pickup line on Juvia."

Both Juvia and Gray became bright red in embarrassment, speaking in unison. " **On Juvia!?** "

Lyon, seeming to not think as clearly, nodded. "That's right. Can't do it? I didn't think so."

Gray's embarrassment quickly changed into annoyance and frustration. He matched Lyon's smirk, grinding his teeth. "Fine then, I'll prove you wrong!"

Gray thought that he had heard laughter behind the bar, but just ignored it. Lyon couldn't keep the smirk off his face as he heard it as well. At least now they weren't laughing at him, but instead at Gray.

Gray took a deep breath as he looked over at Juvia, who at the moment was blushing like mad and trying to remember how to breathe. Gray's expression was serious, but in Juvia's filter, he was a cool and handsome prince. "Juvia…I must be a snowflake. Because I've fallen for you."

Lyon's jaw hit the ground. Gray looked as bored as ever, trying to cover up his embarrassment. The guild hall went silent. Everyone stared at the Ice Mage like Natsu had finally managed to set his hair on fire.

And then there was poor Juvia. The Water Mage's eyes started to swirl as her mouth opened and closed, trying to comprehend that this wasn't a dream and that indeed, the man she loved had just hit on her. Her mind just couldn't handle it. And she melted away, turning into water and passing out all at the same time.

You can imagine the looks of the two Ice Mages as they started to freak out and yell, finally breaking the silence. " **AHHHHHHHH! JUVIA!** "

Lyon turned to Gray, pointing at the puddle on the ground who was indeed Juvia. "You melted my beloved!"

Gray also pointed to her. "One: I didn't do it on purpose! Two: SHE ISN'T YOURS!"

"Well it's not like she's yours!"

"Well who said she isn't!?"

"You did!"

Gray faltered in his anger and his face turned red as he realized what exactly he had been impling. "W-W-Well, I, uh, um, th-that was, ya see, I mean-"

Suddenly there was a loud thud from the guild's doors being slammed open. The two Ice Mages look over to find no one other than the Iron Dragon Slayer himself walk in. At first, he just acted normal, but then as he looked around and noticed everyone staring at him strangely, he raised a brow.

"Uh...What's the matter with all of y-" He cut himself off though when he smelled something very similar to Juvia's sent. But he didn't see her. He locked eyes with Lyon, then Gray, and then he followed Juvia's scent to the puddle of water on the ground.

A few seconds of silence went by as he stared at the puddle. Without changing his expression, or even speaking a word, he slowly walked up to the Ice-Makers, who started to grow increasingly pale with every step Gajeel took towards them.

Finally, he stopped in front of them, leaning his face closer to theirs. The aura around him started to change into a dark one as he brought up his fists, cracking his knuckles. His red eyes peircing them like daggers and voice low. "Which one of you turned Juvia into a freakin' puddle..?"

The two, now as white as the snow they create, gupped at the same time. " **Uh...I can explain…** "

Gajeel raised a brow, losing his patience. They pointed to one another. " **He did it!** "

The dragon slayer took in a sharp breath and slammed a fist in between the two, cracking the bar counter. The two flinched and he let out a growl. "I'm a nice guy, so I'll let it slide today… But if I find her on the ground like this again, you're dead meat. Got it?"

They nodded and Gajeel turned his angry gaze to behind the counter. "WILL YA STOP LAUGHIN' YA DRUNK! IT AIN'T THAT FUNNY!"

Suddenly Cana's red-faced, drunk form stood up from behind the counter, hiccuping and laughing her head off. Lyon and Gray blinked, not realizing it was her laughing at them from before. "Yeah it was hilarious! You should've seen it Gajeel! Lyon was tryin' ta pick up Juvia, and then Gray hit on her!"

She continued to laugh as Gajeel's anger came back tenfold. "You. Did. What?"

Lyon and Gray, as pale as ever, realized how Gajeel took that statement…

He thought she meant _literally_ …

So with the thought in mind that the two were literally beating on the poor girl until she turned into a puddle, Gajeel was furious, and the two knew it.

So they did the best course of action.

They ran as fast as the could.

"GET BACK HERE SO I CAN KILL YA."

" **IT'S A MISUNDERSTANDING!** "

Cana was still laughing and hiccuping when she noticed a stirring on the floor. Looking down, she saw Juvia, back to her old solid self, leaned against the bar and put a hand on her forehead. Cana smiled. "Well! Welcome back to earth sweetheart."

Juvia winced. "W-What happened to Juvia..?"

Cana took a drink of her beer. "Nothin' much. The real question is: What is Gajeel gonna do ta them?" She gestured over to Gajeel chasing the two Mages all around the room, braking furniture, and smashing walls.

Juvia blinked. "H-how long was Juvia out..?"

Cana shrugged. "Like five minutes."

She winced. 'Juvia better go save Lyon-sama and Gray-sama!"

The older woman snorted. "Please! They deserve it for being losers and using you for testing their bad pickup lines."

Though her head still hurt, and she didn't catch most of what Cana was saying, Juvia was determined to save her beloved and friend. So she stood up and tried to stop Gajeel.

Cana watched and only shook her head, taking another drink. "Ah well, at least Lyon and his stupid pickup lines won't be comin' by again anytime soon…"

THE END

 **Hahahaha, so I'm not sure if this was funny enough for you guys, but I had a blast writing it. xD I mean really, got to torture Lyon and Gray at the same time! Bonus!**

 **Pfff, I act like I don't love them but I do really haha**

 **Well, I hope you enjoyed this story~ Thank you for all of the reviews, faves, and follows!**


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